Reviewing Various Mustards: Where to Begin?

Nothing goes better with pretzels than mustard. But choosing the perfect mustard, one that will elevate rather than mask the pretzel, challenges even the most decisive consumer these days. Mustard has gone the route of its peers - mayo, ketchup, and marinade - with newly conceived flavors hitting the shelves regularly. As something of a mustard addict, I offer my perspective on the best and brightest in the mustard kingdom.

First, my ol' standby: French's Bold n' Spicy is a good, cheap, satisfying mustard. While its tanginess might qualify it as "bold," I would not describe this mustard as "spicy." In other words, I have never felt an urgent need for water. At my local supermarket, this mustard clocks in under the two dollar mark; we'll call French's the "best value" mustard.

Gulden's Spicy Brown is, in my opinion, indistinguishable from the French's. If put to a blind taste test, I probably would confuse the two, although French's mustard has slightly more body to it. Judging on aesthetic alone, I personally prefer the French's squeeze bottle - a squatter form with a larger opening for ease of mustard dispensing. Bottom line: both French's and Gulden's offer zesty mustards that will improve even the most unseasoned pretzel.

Trader Joe's Dijon mustard can best be described as dense and intense. The consistency rivals that of some peanut butters, and the flavor is unique - not quite as vinegary as the French's or Gulden's, but not quite as fiery as its similarly-packaged Dijon sibling, Grey Poupon.

Grey Poupon Dijon is mustard with a kick. The dainty mustard spoon, usually lodged beneath other kitchen cookware, is the utensil of choice when handling Grey Poupon. Think of it as a protective measure, ensuring conservative use of this potent condiment. Although Grey Poupon has joined the squeeze bottle bandwagon, opt for the classier glass jar. It dresses up a simple hors d'oeuvre, and, besides, a little bit of this mustard goes a long way.

Looking for something a little less potent and a little more textured? Try Grey Poupon Course Ground. Visible mustard seeds lend rustic good looks to this mustard, but a milder flavor gives the taste buds less to consider.

For a good sweet mustard, try Koop's Arizona Heat. The pumpkin color might scream, "Disgustingly artificial!" But the flavor is not sickeningly sweet, and true to its title, this mustard actual leaves a burn.

Conspicuously absent from this list is yellow mustard. Why? Yellow mustard has its place as a hotdog condiment or deviled egg ingredient, but when mustard functions as a dip, Dijon and Spicy Brown work best.