Ridiculous Opinions About Los Angeles Beaches

The beaches of Los Angeles are all beautiful, all are fronting the Pacific Ocean. Some of these beaches might be the kinds of places that you might like to go and visit.

In the little town of Topanga Beach is Topanga State Beach and Las Tumas State Beach. This is another beach that I like, on a good day, when all is well. On a bad day, the locals will stare at you as well as everyone else who is unfamiliar. There are no posted signs at the gate to say, "the locals are having a good day", or "the locals are having a bad day". If people absolutely do not notice you, these beaches are great places to go. Someone might say hello to you.

The beaches of Santa Barbara for places to go people-watching, for the local youth hostels, and for exclusivity. Nobody stares, nobody bothers anybody, and everything goes pretty smoothly, even on a not-happening weekend. Once in a while, even the latest name drop serves meals to customers here, in peace, at the museum events or a hotel buffet. The beach is great, the surf is great, and everyone minds their own business here. This beach is too far away to be considered as a beach.

Places to go if you like to argue

Long Beach as a place to take people who are not really into the beach, for the most part - see the boat, the Queen Mary, go to the shops, wander around, look at the water, see why it is not a great beach. Long Beach is for groups, for car loads, van loads, and shuttle buses full of people. This is probably the place in Los Angeles for arguments and break-ups.

Sure, Santa Monica pier if you are bringing along your immediate family, need to get a date to show your persuasion, or are doing the rites of penance, or you are into Route 66. Santa Monica pier is a tourist trap, and if you look like a local, people will start asking you for directions or the best table in the dining hall. The area has gone through enough biological remediation that the water looks almost nice enough to swim in, and a few people few here actually go fishing. There are enough people here, at the Santa Monica pier, near the terminus of Route 66, that a common thing to do is to break up with your ex while arranging a date with your next. The beach is frequently indiscernible from the concrete in some ways, though, not as hard. Santa Monica State Beach and Will Rogers State Beach are in Santa Monica, and I would not venture to either of these beaches, as these places are massive pick-up joints.

The beaches of Ventura are crowded, everyone goes there, and if you like hearing "Ventura Highway" or singing it, this is the place to go on the weekend. If you need a gig, this is the place to go; bring your cooler, transistor radio, and get ready to get into a variation of the "beach sand argument", if that is your idea of fun. A lot of folks who go to Ventura claim that their weekend is not complete unless they have hosted at least one major fracas.

Or, just drive up and down Highway 101 if you are in doubt, take the bus up and down Highway 101, even bicycle or walk the Pacific Coast Highway "Route 1". These are great ways of traveling that allow you to see tons and tons of beach sand and lots of other beach front scenery while watching the Pacific Ocean. If you are renting a car, get a weekly rental, and spend a day at each of these beach areas, save gas, enjoy the great stereo and the recliner that the rental car offers, as well as the storage area for your beach chair, beach umbrella, and beach blanket. Enter Pismo Beach Bob's world's worst poetry contest, see if you can earn a free trip to Pismo Beach, which is along the border between Southern California and Central California. You might not want to drive there, however, you can still enter the contest via mail, and get out of the sun at noontime, thus avoiding sunburn. If you do not like my opinion, go and form your own. I have not yet had a major blow-out at Pismo Beach, however, I think that this is the place to go for a massively berserk screaming match that might be called the world's worst poetry reading, by the locals, if you are near the Pismo Beach Hardware Store, however, please, call first and make a reservation.