Romancing the Self

Because of the hurly-burly pace of life that everyone seems bent on keeping, it is so easy to forget to take care of some of our very basic needs. We forget to relax and to exercise and to simply treat ourselves kindly. Romance is one of those basic needs that lifts the spirit and makes us feel special. But what do we do when our parter is also too busy to pay much attention to the simple pleasures of life - or if we don't have a partner in the first place?

What makes you think you need a partner to put a little romance in your life?

Think about what it means when you want a partner to romance you. Maybe it's a nice, quiet dinner with wine and soft music. Or perhaps it's candles and a hot, sudsy bath. Of course, romance with a partner can be a lot of fun, but that doesn't mean that you can't enjoy feeling special even if you are alone.

However, as nice as romance with a partner can be, romancing the self shouldn't be considered something you do when you have no better options. In order to be truly happy in a relationship with another person, you have to be able to enjoy time alone with yourself. After all, your significant other should be more than just a warm body that keeps you from feeling alone. Therefore, you need to take time to enjoy alone-time whether you are in a romantic relationship or not.

It's even a good idea to plan regular time to enjoy your own company. Of course, that may simply mean that you're enjoying an evening at home with a good book or movie, or planning a nice long walk along the beach on your own. That is the sort of thing that most people do who really enjoy their alone-time. However, if you want a romantic dinner or a candle-lit bath, then make it happen for yourself. You don't have to wait for a partner to do it for you.

But let's say for the sake of argument that you decide to romance the self while your significant other is enjoying a hobby at the house. If he decides to come and say hello while you enjoy your candle-lit bath, he may end up as part of the romance. If not, he will probably notice that you enjoy that type of thing and decide to surprise you by running water for you and setting out candles at a later date.

The point is, people who enjoy other people are the kinds of people who enjoy themselves, whether they are alone or in a group. Therefore, they don't feel that someone else has to do a particular thing to enable them to enjoy an evening. Romancing the self is a great way to relax and make yourself feel pampered.