Romeo and Juliet Retold in Limerick Form

If you came here hoping to hear the story of Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet told another way, I am sorry to disappoint you.

Our Juliet is no longer a shy virginal creature, waiting on the balcony for her romantic Romeo. She is a creature of the night, known to frequent clubs and bars, flaunting her curvaceous body in front of all the young Italians in the town, and rumor has it that she is easy prey.

Romeo has acquired a different character as well. He is a typical hot bloodied Italian male, out at night just looking for one thing, and tonight, where our story begins, there is only one thing on his mind... sweet Juliet...

And so dear friends, let our story begin...

Act One: Outside The Slap And Tickle Nightclub

There was a young girl from Genoa
Who was rumored to be a real go-er
When Romeo tried
To pinch her backside
She told him to go a bit slower.

Act Two Three Months Later

Now Juliet is in quite a state
Her period is several months late
She let Romeo give her
Too much of his quiver
And now she is putting on weight

The End

Romeo and Juliet
by Bill Wagglestaff