Russian Spy Comedy Ends with Musical Number

It seems the Russian spy comedy has ended with a musical number. The best part is, this isn't even an obscure movie review.

On July 25^th, Russian prime minister (and former KGB agent) Vladimir Putin met with several members of the spy ring that was deported from the US earlier this month. After the meeting, Putin emphasized with the deported spies stating they were "betrayed" and led "tough lives." He also said he sang patriotic songs with the spies, specifically "Where the Motherland Begins."

Can we please roll the credits and cue the house lights on this story? It's not that I'm sick of this story by any means, but I can't think of a more perfect ending to this whole bizarre affair.

It's hard to believe an old, hardcore KGB agent is emphasizing with this inept bunch. Keep in mind, they were living in the United States for more than a decade, but failed to transmit anything significant enough to even charge them with espionage. They apparently lived the life, but failed to do any real work beyond gossiping and Google searches.

I would make a quip hear about how Putin's empathy is the equivalent of bestowing a medal on Don Quixote, but I just remembered, the man of La Mancha was able to actually hit the windmills.

They often say the best comedies are the ones where no one is acting like it's a comedy. I think this case proves the rule. The media, the spies, and Putin all seem to be treating this as some sort of action thriller as opposed to the comedy it actually is.

Had this been an actual spy thriller, there would now be questions of national security and whether or not the Cold War is truly over.

Since this is a comedy though, everything has been turned upside down.

The Russians send spies into our country, and it ends up a victory for the Americans. The bad guys are caught without having done any actual harm even with more than a decade head start. We then trade these semi-spies for some real spies on our side. To top it all off, it gives us one more good laugh at Cold War Russia without anyone having to make an actual joke.

I am sure someone will make a movie out of this someday. I can already see the final scene. The ten spies and Putin are all sitting around a table enjoying a celebratory dinner. Putin raises a glass, praises them for doing their job, says sorry it didn't work out, toasts them, and then they all start in on a rousing rendition of "Where the Motherland Begins."

No jokes needed for that one last laugh.

Sources:

"Putin Says Spies Expelled From US Had 'Tough Lives,'" BBC News, 07/25/2010

Scott Shane and Benjamin Weiser, "Spying Suspects Seemed Short on Secrets," Washington Post, 06/29/2010

Mary Beth Sheridan and Jerry Markon, "U.S., Russia Reach Deal On Exchanging Spies," Washington Post, 07/09/2010