Sarah Palin Geography Pop Quiz

"Hi everyone. I'm so excited to be here today. Are you ready for a fun geography pop quiz? I thought you were. Okay, let's hunker down and put on your thinking caps. This is really hard. You betcha."

1. The United States is:

a. A country in South America.
b. A country in Asia.
c. A country in Africa.
d. A country in North Dakota.

2. Asia is:

a. Right next to Alaska.
b. Really, really big.
c. A great place to eat Chinese food.
d. My maid.

3. The Pacific Ocean is located:

a. On the East Coast.
b. Way up there in the Arctic.
c. Right next to Disneyland.
d. It's really called the Specific Ocean.

4. A lake is:

a. Something politicians are told to jump into.
b. A body of water bigger than a puddle.
c. Short for the Lakers. Part of a baskeball team.
d. Like without the a in the middle.

5. Washington D.C. is:

Where I plan to live when I am your next President.
b. A haven for thugs, murderers, and lobbyists.
c. Ethically challenged. My kind of place.
d. Next to Alaska.

6. An earthquake is:

a. The way my tummy feels when I'm hungry.
b. Just like a volcano but without the ashes.
c. The way I feel when I don't get my way.
d. All of the above.

7. Iran is:

a. The past tense of I run.
b. A country next to Alaska.
c. Run by a bunch of folks who have nuclear arms for limbs.
d. Who cares. Just bomb the place.

8. Australia is:

a. Down over.
b. Upside down.
c. Inside out.
d. Over easy.

9. New Hampshire is:

a. A state with a lot of tea partiers.
b. Right next to Alaska.
c. A tiny state. They love me there.
d. I'm not sure. I'll have to check my palm.

10.Alaska is:

a. A big state with a lot of bears and oil.
b. A big state with a lot of bare people with oily hair.
c. A big state with a lot of beer drinkers with olive oil complexions.
d. Who cares. I can see Russia from there.