Scammed at LA Fitness

LA Fitness may be adequate for working out, but when it comes to account management, they are used car salesmen at best.

Every year LA Fitness offers some sort of promotion that makes joining the gym sound easy as pie. Well, that part is true. Everything runs like a well-oiled machine while you're signing your contract and direct debit agreement. What they don't tell you while you're signing up for spinning classes is the sort of customer service department they run and billing practices they engage in. Here are the three major scams LA Fitness runs on its members.

Scam 1: Sign up discrepancies - You may not be getting what you asked for.

The enrollment counselors are not there to help you get into that size 4 dress, they are there to make money for LA Fitness and line their pockets with commissions. Just like used car salesmen, it's their job to take you for all you're worth. Though the moral of the story is to avoid LA Fitness like the plague, if you do decide to sign up, and are prepared to have a membership there until you die which will then pass on to your children, make sure you sit there and read the entire contract before signing anything.

Don't skim over the long parts or the "yadda yadda yadda" sections. Those are important. If nothing else, take some pleasure in making your overzealous salesperson stare at the wall while you take 20 minutes to read the contract and the accompanying tiny print. It will bring you great satisfaction later.

If you do end up being charged a different monthly fee than you were quoted or services you signed up for are not available to you, make sure you at least spill some Kool-Aid on the carpet or throw toilet paper wads onto the ceiling before leaving the gym that day. Why? Because it's a preemptive strike on the war you are about to engage in.

You will have to fight with unhelpful staff at the gym, rude staff at the corporate call center, and eventually enjoy nice long chats with the collection agency who wants that extra money you never signed up to give. In addition, when you do try to call headquarters to resolve your issue, make sure you have some extra cash on hand. There is no 800 number available to call and if you're paying a standard long distance rate, those 30 minutes on hold are really going to chap your hide.

Lesson 1: Read the entire contract. Satisfaction will be had if, while slowly reading through the contract, you ask questions about each paragraph.

Warning: Irritating your membership enrollment counselor may result in additional fees and headache. Proceed with caution.

Scam 2: Personal Trainers - Yesterday's burger flippers are today's body sculptors.

LA Fitness salespeople push training on you like it's the next best thing to chocolate.

"A personal trainer can help you meet your fitness goals. Sign up today!"

An LA Fitness personal trainer is nothing more than a workout buddy. In each gym, there are typically one or two trainers who are actually certified, though usually those certifications are not even through a reputable company. Many companies offer personal trainer certification, including some online who offer the package deal for $49.99 and a same-day certification print out.

Not only that, but LA Fitness does not actually employ the trainers. This is probably so they don't have to sell you the line that they know the trainers are certified through a rigorous program. Trainers are employed through an entirely different company, Body of Change, which is housed under LA Fitness. This means when you have an issue with billing, scheduling and the like, your friendly LA Fitness staff member gets to say, "We don't know anything about the trainers. They are not affiliated with LA Fitness."

Additionally, because the trainers are not employed directly by LA Fitness, the training manager will not have any idea about the schedule or whereabouts of your trainer. This means if an appointment is cancelled, which is a major complaint of those with personal trainers at LA Fitness; there is no way to reschedule until your "work out buddy" decides to call you back.

There have even been complaints at specific LA Fitness locations concerning instructions being removed from weights machines in order to encourage members to sign up for a personal trainer just to learn how to use the machine.

Once you have signed up for a personal training contract, be advised that you will be billed even if your "workout buddy" cancels your appointment. It's your job to make up those appointments, no matter what your schedule might be. Personal training contracts are sold in session numbers, so there is no canceling. Additionally, if you do not cancel when your sessions have ended, they'll go ahead and renew that for you.

Lesson 2: Just say no to personal training at LA Fitness.

Scam 3: "Cancel anytime"

"Cancel anytime" actually translates into "You may attempt to cancel your LA Fitness membership at anytime, but we'll be damned if you ever get out of this contract".

They make it sound so easy in their ads. "Sign up today! Low monthly fee! Cancel anytime!"

Whether you've decided to buy that home gym you've always wanted, decided to run outdoors, or prefer Big Macs to ellipticals, one thing is for sure; you're staring at a 3 month long battle with LA Fitness headquarters. With as many complaints spewing out of the mouths of ex-LA Fitness members about cancellation policies, it's surprising that a class action lawsuit hasn't been filed against them.

So, if you're contemplating discontinuing your morning wait for cardio equipment, here are the steps to canceling a membership at LA Fitness.

1. Get online to print the "Cancellation" form.
2. Get on the phone to call gym as the "Cancellation" form is no longer available on lafitness.com
3. Drive to the gym to pick up the cancellation form from front desk.
4. Get irritated that the front desk wants you to explain, in detail, your reasons for canceling prior to giving you the cancellation form.
5. Look perplexed as the staff member tells you that your form must be mailed by certified mail or "it may not be received".
6. Look irritated and shrug as the staff member tells you two additional months fees will be required, on top of which you paid your last months dues when you signed up. (That's right. 3 months more gym time while you wait for the cancellation.)
7. When asking why it takes so long, note the staff member's irritation as he explains you must give 30 days notice to cancel your membership. If you do not give that notice one week prior to your next billing, it becomes 2 months of billing on top of last month already paid.
8. Sigh and mutter, "Kenneth Lay must have started this gym"
9. Mail form by certified mail to Irvine, California. (Very important step! If you neglect the "certified mail" part, your standard mail WILL BE LOST resulting in an additional 2 months of gym fees. Irvine, CA USPS is apparently incompetent.)
10. Wait.
11. Wait.
12. Wait some more.
13. Call to check on the receipt of the cancellation form and receive a response of either "We have no record of your forms" or "they are being processed".
14. Become perplexed as three weeks has passed. Begin to think the "processing" pile looks more like a plastic bag-lined, oval-shaped can on the floor.
15. One day later receive call from LA Fitness headquarters asking for a credit card update.
16. Yell "No!" into the phone. Pace the floor while thinking of some sort of David and Goliath tactic where you single-handedly take down the tyrannical LA Fitness headquarters; Office Space style.
    

And here's where the steps can differ. Some people successfully have their memberships cancelled and their direct debits cease after 3 months. However, there are those who continue to receive bills, collection calls, and have monthly gym dues still being drafted out of their accounts.

Mailing any sort of important documentation by certified mail is a good idea, but any company who suggests it is a necessity because "it might get lost in the mail" is most certainly engaged in fraudulent practices.

Lesson 3: Make sure to start the cancellation process 3 months prior to actually discontinuing the use of LA Fitness facilities. A psychic reading may be necessary in order to know that you might want to cancel in 3 months time.

The moral of the story: Just say NO to LA Fitness.

DISCLAIMER: Author does not encourage vandalism. Please do not destroy gym property on purpose.