Second Trimester Funnies

My second trimester sucked too, but it helped that I was working again. I mean I couldn't even stand the smell of food cooking, especially if the food was being made with onions.. It was totally grossed me out. I started farted a whole hell of a lot. To the point where I had to start blaming others. It was ridiculous, my feet were starting to swell up, and my shoes were starting to become too tight. It's bad enough I already wear a size ten; I pretty much had Shrek feet with polish. So by now, I am employed with a pretty decent job. I worked for Dr. SausageNose and she had no idea I was preggers. Although I was starting to notice my size 3 pants and small tops were starting to make me look like a desperate chick in need of clothes that fit. I knew I was going to have to tell her sooner or later. Unfortunately, around my fourth month my grandmother passed. (Miss Rebecca Jones, may you rest in peace, love your Barbie Doll) As if I was not emotional enough, it was hard seeing my mother lose her best friend. And even harder to comprehend the fact that my grandmother was gone for good. But that is life as we know it.

So months four through six weren't all that. We were going to my prenatal visits on a regular basis. Dee was there with me at every single visit, except for one. Another petty argument about BEAGLE. (Beagle stood for baby eagle, since we didn't know the sex I just put a B in front of our last name to stand for baby) You know the type of arguments you have with your unborn child's father about either the name of the child, if you are going to be breastfeeding, what the child can or can't eat. Whatever, it was one of those. And he didn't come with me. You know no one ever tells you how much preparation has to take place before a baby is born. The things that you and the child's father must discuss if you are going to raise a child together. But the messed up thing is you spend so much time arguing that you end up missing the point. Then you realize that you are both fighting for the same cause. The best interest of the child.

I also went through a series of genetic testing. Now that kind of freaked me out because I started thinking of what the baby was going to look like. I know they say all babies are cute, but no, not all babies are. So I was worried that Beagle might come out funny looking. Have you ever seen people who look a little off? Just a little bit funny? Well that is what I was starting to worry about. I know Dee and I have nice features, but would they be nice mixed together?

I remember going to see a nutritionist on a regular basis. I also remember that they didn't like me anymore than I liked them; I mean who were they to tell me what my body should be or should not be gaining. It's not like all the weight I gained was due to me eating badly, I developed a lot of muscle while I was pregnant. I worked out 5 days a week. So now this is another messed up thing they don't tell you. Tons of people who are in the medical profession aren't professionals. Some of them were just trained on the job, and they think they can diagnose you or give you medical advice. I felt like I was told a lot of different opinions and superstitions from people who were not qualified to be offering that type of advice. So my point is don't listen to just anybody at your doctor's office or whenever you are in a medical facility. Just because you wear scrubs, doesn't mean you are an honorary doctor or midwife... to be continued