Secrets of Sexcess

So, you want to have great sex? Well, fortunately for you, you are about to get lucky (pun intended). I'm about to share with you the secrets of sexcess.

Sex is so much more than what occurs between the sheets. At its best, sex is a mind-blowing, multi-sensory experience that-if you do it right-leaves you deeply relaxed, blissfully exhausted and intimately connected with your lover.

Once you learn the secrets of sexcess, you will enjoy a lifetime of immensely pleasurable sexual experiences beyond your wildest dreams, and you and your lover will be thanking me for years to come.

The Secrets of Sexcess

Sexcess Secret Number One-Planning for Sex

Great sex requires careful planning. What are you going to wear? What sexual activities are you going to engage in? Where will you make love?

Decide in advance what you plan to do and when you plan to do it. Mark the date on your calendar. Write down the time in your appointment book. Decide what you plan to wear?

Are you going out for the evening? If so, you'll want to arrange your boudoir in advance. If you will be staying in, you'll want to plan a menu, set the scene and make any other necessary preparations.

Sexcess Secret Number Two-Preparing for Sex

You will need to be relaxed, revitalized and rejuvenated before you embark upon your sexual adventure.

Do some stretches. If you like, do a few yoga poses. Go for a brisk 20 minute walk. Now that you've built up your stamina, you're ready for a little rest and relaxation.

Take a long, warm bath. Pat yourself dry with a luxuriously absorbent towel. Use your dental rinse. Brush and floss your teeth. Gargle with mouthwash. Put on your deodorant. Massage soothing, sensual aromatic oil onto your skin. Dab on a bit of perfume.

Slip into a thick, fluffy bathrobe and comfy slippers. Put on your makeup. Style your hair. Give yourself a manicure and a pedicure. Put on some pretty polish.

Layout your clothing, including the lingerie you'll be wearing (at least briefly) later in the evening. Put special sheets on the bed. Setup lighting, floral arrangements and any props you will need.

Put your birth control and STD prevention equipment within easy reach of your love nest.

Turn on some music. Glance over your menu. Perform whatever food preparation tasks you need to.

When it's time, put on your sexy lingerie. Get dressed. Give yourself a final once over in the mirror.

Now you're ready to greet your lover.

Sexcess Secret Number Three-Do Your Research

In order to drive your man to ecstasy, you need to find out exactly what makes his manhood stand up and say "Hello there." To do this you will have to engage in what will probably be the most fun research project you've ever undertaken in your entire life.

While there a multiple ways to tackle this task, I strongly recommend the direct approach: ask him. Ask him what his sexual fantasies are. Ask him about his previous sexual experiences; you'll want to know what he likes as well as what he doesn't like.

If you are uncomfortable asking him outright, you could try a role-playing game where you play either an executive or a market researcher interviewing him about his sexual experiences, fantasies, preferences and inhibitions (hopefully he won't have too many of these.) You could dress up in a skirt suit, stilettos and crotchless panties. Of course you'll want to cross and uncross your legs multiple times during your, um, interview.

After you've gathered as much firsthand data as you can, you'll need do a little detective work. Check his pockets, his wallet and his papers for indications of his sexual preferences. What you're looking for here is business cards, fliers, invitations, phone numbers, matchbooks...anything that might contain some information about what he finds pleasurable and/or sexy. Carefully analyze the clues you come across. Does he frequent a bar? Has he patronized gentlemen's clubs? Has he visited an adult toy store?

Your due diligence will pay big dividends when your man shows you over again how much he appreciates your taking the time to find out what pleases him.

Sexcess Secret Number Four-Creating A Mood

Great sex is all about creating a mood.

The hardest part of creating a mood is deciding what kind of mood you want to create. The possibilities are endless.

You could transform your boudoir into an exotic hideaway by burning incense and draping sheer, sensual fabric around your bed. You could light candles around your bed and bathtub à la "She's Gotta Have It." You could setup a sexy scavenger hunt that leads to a most delectable treasure: you!

Use the combination of your knowledge of his fantasies, preferences and desires and your own creativity to create a powerfully sensual and seductive mood.

Sexcess Secret Number Five-Exciting His Senses

Great sex is a multi-sensory experience. Each and every one of your man's five senses should be stimulated, titillated and tantalized.

Prepare a treat for each of his five senses: wear an eye-popping outfit; play his favorite sexy songs; apply some enticing perfume; hand-feed him strawberries dipped in chocolate; massage him from head to toe with warm aromatic oil.

Sexcess Secret Number Six-Foreplay

Once you've got him all warm and tingly from your sensual massage, it's time to begin foreplay.

Tempt him with playful nips, soulful kisses and gentle caresses. The point of foreplay is to whet his appetite for the big event: making love.

Explore his entire body, and delight in finding his unique erogenous zones. Treat his entire body as if it is a single unified sex organ...because it is.

Don't forget to whisper naughty nothings into his ear!

Sexcess Secret Number Seven-The Big Event

Though I'm sure you will find plenty of other things to do with yourselves, making love is the no-holds-barred main event in the sexual arena.

This is where your multi-tasking skills will truly come in handy. The most masterful lady lovers are able to skillfully combine sexy talk, with kissing, caressing and wildly sexy pelvic motions to take their man to ecstasy multiple times per night.

When you make love to a man, you want him to feel sensations he has never felt with any woman; you want him to feel your signature sensations. This is where all of those Kegels exercises and work with Ben Wa balls will REALLY come in handy.

Don't be shy about showing off the strength of your pelvic and vaginal muscles. Men can't get enough of a woman who can squeeze them in all the right places.

Sexcess Secret Number Eight-Go for the Encore

Repeat the steps in Sexcess Secrets numbers Six and Seven.

Sexcess Secret Number Nine-Afterplay

After intercourse (and whatever else you do when you're feeling frisky), the culminating act might be over but the erotic experience is still underway. During this time of afterplay, you'll want to talk, kiss, hold each other and just enjoy basking in the glow of your deliciously satisfying lovemaking.

Sexcess Secret Number Ten-Show Appreciation

Just as you wouldn't dream of failing to send a thank you note when someone gives you a gift you appreciate, you shouldn't dream of failing to show your gratitude toward a man who has given you pleasure beyond measure. Tell him how wonderful he was over and over again. Men love being told they do something well-especially that-and they love the women who take the initiative to tell them.

If you follow my advice and use the secrets as a guide, you can look forward to a lifetime of sexcess.