Selecting A Gift At A Chinese Christmas Party For Men and Women

When certain segments of our family line come together during Christmas we have what everyone here calls a Chinese Christmas. I was not around for the naming of the event so I am unable to tell you how the name was derived. It has always been Chinese Christmas. Each family member who attends is told to bring a gift for the event and the price is usually set low at $25.00. The men hold a drawing separate from the women so the men will not go home with a beautiful set of cups and saucers or the like.

The Rules (Very Loosely Defined)

When everyone arrives (we usually have about fifty in attendance) the men draw a number from the men's pool and the women pull a number from their pool. We usually have more women than men but it still works this way. After a covered dish dinner we arrange all the women's wrapped gifts on one table and the men's gifts (crudely wrapped) on another table. The man with the number 1 and the woman with the number 1 each select and open a gift. This is the only easily understood step in Chinese Christmas. After this the game becomes more difficult to explain. The man with the number 2 and the woman with the number 2 either select the one gift already opened or choose a gift from the table. That is not a difficult choice to make because it is an either-or situation. Pick the one gift that was opened or choose another from the table. If the man with number 2 decides to take the opened gift the man who surrenders the opened gift must select from the table again. Each time a gift is selected from the table we proceed to the next number. The man and woman with the number 3 select from opened gifts or from the table. Men cannot cross over and select a woman's gift and vice versa.

At this point you can begin to have double and triple selections of open gifts. The man with the number 4 starts by selecting an opened gift and that in turn causes that person to again select another open gift. This continues until the selection ends up at the table for a new gift to be opened. The one rule in Chinese Christmas that is difficult to track is "if you have possessed the gift three times you keep it and it cannot be selected again".

The one prohibition is "there is no back and forth selecting". If someone selects your opened gift you must either select someone else's opened gift or open a gift on the table. You cannot retrieve the gift just taken from you. The game ends when the man and the woman with the highest number are told to select and the selection process ends up with someone deciding that they would rather take a chance on the one gift left on the table rather than select from the opened gifts that have not been selected by one person three times.

To "Select" or "Steal"

One of the problems that can be experienced at Chinese Christmas is the natural tendency to use the word "steal" instead of "select". One very elderly family member got caught up in the event and thought the word steal meant just that. She was protecting her nephew's possession of a gift that someone was trying to "steal" and she absolutely refused to give it up.

The game can be rigged for a special event.

We had a young college student in the family who brought his long-term girl friend to the event. We let her pick her number from a special basket that had twenty-five pieces of paper, all with the number "25". She was set up to be the last person to select a gift and all the women knew not to select her "special" gift. When she opened her gift (an engagement ring) the young man went down on one knee and proposed. She should have known something special was happening because a large number of the young man's buddies were there to just witness the event but not participate in it. The young lady accepted and they are now the proud parents of three great kids.

If you think the game has possibilities just try it one year. You will only have $25.00 at stake and you may have a good time. Remember not to get to very attached to any gift because as soon as you do, somebody is going to come along and "steal" it.