Self Cutting: What Parents Need to Understand

Antoinette McGowan
Most parents do not realize what this is and some that have heard about it have a lot of confusion about what it really is. Cutting is not a failed suicide attempt. Cutting is just what it is: Cutting. Most teens that cut themselves are not suicidal. Don't get me wrong some may actually be suicidal but for the most part they are not. So now that you understand that part of it, put the suicide part aside and find out what is really going on with your teen.

Teens cut themselves for many different reasons. But no matter what the reason behind the cutting is , the main part of the cutting is a coping mechanism. It is a way for teens to cope with whatever is bothering them. Also cutting poses a different coping aspect for each teen. All teens are different and all teens will not fall into all categories. So remember when dealing with cutting focus on your teen and not some other teen

Cutting can provide teens that are depressed with an outlet to feel something. By cutting themselves they feel pain and sometimes in the state of mind they are in , pain is better than feeling nothing. So depression needs to be addressed and steps taken to help your child learn how to cope with depression and start to feel better.

Sometimes teens just feel overwhelmed with everything that is going on and can not seem to cope with all of it. Cutting provides them an outlet for these emotions and gives them a sense of some control. Cutting to them is something they can control. With this you need to help your child address what in their lives is causing them to feel overwhelmed. Counseling is needed to help them to learn they don't have to be perfect and they don't have to do it all alone. With counseling they can learn new and more productive ways of dealing with the overwhelming pressures.

When confronting your teen over what they are doing , you should not come at them in a confrontational manner. Doing this can actually make things worse. Sit down with them and discuss this calmly and with understanding and compassion. Talk with doctors also to help find a way to get your teen the help they need.

Some warning signs to look for that may point to cutting is to watch what your teen wears, look for stock piling of rubber bands and razors that have been taken apart. Also teens do not always cut on just their arms. Inner thighs provide a good cutting area that is easily hidden with jeans.

By watching what your teen is wearing you can see if they are wearing what would have previously not been worn by them in the current weather. For instance it is summer and now all of a sudden your teen is walking around in long sleeves when before they would have worn short sleeves. They use to love wearing shorts in the summer time now all of a sudden they won't wear anything but jeans.

Remember though that teens will experiment with a lot of different styles though out their teen years. So watch their behavior also so that you can get a better understanding of whether this should be looked into or if it is just a clothing change.

Rubber bands are used in cutting by some teens as a way to numb the skin before cutting. Despite the fact that some teens cut to feel the pain , not all of them who cut want to feel the full effects of the pain. So they will use rubber bands to flick against the skin to numb it.

Others will use the rubber band to cut off the area to be cut to cause more blood to bleed from the wound. By cutting they can feel the pain and by bleeding they can remember they are human. It is a state of mind a person is in when they are cutting that determines what effects they need to get from it to feel better.

If you feel your child may be cutting themselves do not hesitate to find out. If indeed they are cutting do not dismiss this. Cutting is a sign that something is wrong and to fix it you need to find out what is wrong. But do not stop and finding out what is wrong, you need to get professional help for your child. Cutting is a serious and dangerous habit that needs to be addressed.

Published by Antoinette McGowan

I am a stay at home mother. I love writing. Many topics interest me when it comes to writing.  View profile

  • Cutting can provide teens that are depressed with an outlet to feel something.
  • Sometimes teens just feel overwhelmed with everything that is going
  • Rubber bands are used in cutting by some teens as a way to numb the skin before cutting.

12 Comments

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  • Amanda 7/2/2008

    my name is Amanda i am 15 years old i have been cutting myself for 3 years and it is a result of rape at a young age and my father abusing me, i also witnessed my father trying to kill himself with an overdose of pills. i just cut my legs about an hour ago but its starting to get worse i think i will start having to cut myself deeper to get the releaf i felt at first if anyone can help please try . i am on anti depressants for adults and am seeing a psycologist it isnot seeming to work and im starting to loose hope ...

  • Heather B.8/3/2007

    Good advice.

  • Erin Adams8/1/2007

    Very informative!

  • shawn dodd6/12/2007

    i have been going through alot the past 5 years . i am 18 now and i have been cutting for 3 years and i have tryed to kill my self at least 45 times . i dont know if anyone word care if i dieed . i have tryed to get help but no one can help me .

  • shawn dodd6/12/2007

    i have been going through alot the past 5 years . i am 18 now and i have been cutting for 3 years and i have tryed to kill my self atlest 45 times . i dont know if anyone word care if i dieed .

  • Veronika Fevers4/18/2007

    Great info for parents...

  • Antoinette McGowan4/8/2007

    "Thenyouwo" you need to speak with someone. There are safer ways of dealing with stress and the problems that bother you. Cutting yourself is dangerous, please speak to someone who can help you.

  • [Thenyouwouldknow]4/4/2007

    I am quite displeased at this; If my parents read this, which there is almost no chance of happening, they will find out, and the world will end.
    Jamie, no matter how hard I try, I can't bleed from clenching :S, well, that's what razerblades are for then I suppose.

  • Jamie K. Wilson3/26/2007

    I didn't cut; I clenched my fists til my palms bled from fingernails digging in. Same net effect. It releases stress. No one ever knew about it either. I suspect if I'd thought of cutting I might have done it the regular way, but then, fingernails are always available.

  • Kristina Jones3/17/2007

    When I was a teen, I knew a couple of girls who were into cutting. It was very disturbing to me then because I never knew what it was all about. Excellent article!

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