Self-evaluation - Have You Tried It?

An individual's evaluation of himself is determined gradually by his understanding of his relative position in some group of which he is a member. And also, in the rating he would give himself in a group of which he is not a member but to which he aspires.

One reason the grown up has so much difficulty living with himself is his tendency to observe himself in comparison with 'the ideal.' Girls who try to rate their own physical attractiveness may feel badly when they use a calendar girl as a model. Boys often suffer feelings of inferiority when they fail to compete with adults. Older college students are found to be more cynical than younger one; it is the price one may pay for becoming more sophisticated in learning from experience.

The measure of self which is visible in the grown up becomes somewhat more unified with age and experience. First comes the individual's understanding of his abilities and status. This relates to the image he presents to the outside world, to the kind of person he thinks he is. This concept is influenced by his body image, his personal appearance, dress, and grooming; by his abilities and disposition, his values, beliefs, interests and ambitions.

This basic concept is enhanced when there is intellectual ability and the skill to meet new problems. The slow reader, for example, may find difficulty in learning generally, so that his negative concepts operate in all learning situations. Even for the person with good abilities and recognized status, the self concept has its ups and downs. We may take occasional flings at being someone else, but they are temporary. And we may identify with a loser temporarily when depressed. But we usually find that attempts to erase our self image are as fruitless as trying to paint out a shadow.

The second measure of the grown up is transitory understanding of self. Here, the self image fluctuates from compulsive, compensatory and unrealistic to insightful and practical. This is the stage at which the 'inner-directed' mood comes into conflict with the 'other directed' influence. Since in this transitory phase there is a tendency for the individual to reflect more on his problems than on his accomplishments, the transitory understanding of self is mostly negative.

Third, the social self develops with its ups and downs. In an optimistic mood, the grown up comes to think that other people see him in a good light; when depressed, he perceives that others depreciate him. When he feels socially inept, there is a tendency for him to amplify his feelings of insecurity. Social acceptance, as he views it does not quite balance out his negative feelings.

The ideal self is the kind of person who involves questions of standards and comparisons. Here the person relates his aspirations to what he views as his ability.