Selling Your Body & Soul for a Paycheck

When first looking at the title of this article your first thoughts may be, this is an article about prostitution, stripping, or maybe even working in the porn industry. Well, you would be wrong on all accounts. What this article is about is the typical, average every day woman that looks the other way when her man is cheating, abusing her, or is suffering from some serious addiction, just to keep that extra paycheck coming in.

I have now been on my own for the past nine years of my life. It has definitely been a struggle at times, especially financially. However, because I have been through a lot in my life, and have learned much along the way, my last thought would be to ever have an abusive, addicted, or cheating man in my life, just to be more financially comfortable. Unfortunately, there are many women who sell their souls and bodies on a daily basis, just to do that.

I personally know of several women at the present time that do just this. One woman I know puts up with a loveless marriage and whose husband treats her like an idiot child. She even admits he is just a paycheck. They have been married for about forty years. I know of another woman whose husband is verbally abusive, and degrades her. This woman has a good job of her own, so she is not stuck as someone might think. They live quite well, and want for nothing. They have been married about thirty-eight years. Still another woman who is not married but living with her man for about eight years, who also has a great job. She has stated to me when I asked why are you staying with him, the reply was, I know where my bread is buttered. He is a raving alcoholic. They also live as I would say is quite comfortable. These are but just a few women like this I have known over the years that do this.

Because I know these three women quite well, and we have talked over many years, I am confident in why they are staying. These are women who look the other way to what they think is in their best interest in order to live a more financially secure life. These aren't women that have little children and are afraid that without the second paycheck their child may go hungry. These are women that exchange their self-esteem, their pride, and their dignity out of fear of doing without.

How low their self-esteem must be to think that a steak at dinnertime instead of Hamburger Helper is worth more than they are. Thankfully, I have never had to struggle with this type of thinking. Again, I have been through a lot, but I have never been bought and paid for, and I know I never will. Do these women just wake up one day, and think what's the difference; at least I don't have to worry about being homeless? I am sure there are as many different reasons, at least in their head, as there are women who do this.

Please know I am not condemning these women, quite the contrary. I feel sorry for these women, and they have my compassion. It must be horrible to believe that a better level of comfort is so much more important than oneself. It really makes me wonder what happened to them along the way in life, to have so little respect for who they are, and what they deserve. At this point you may be thinking, maybe they are in love with these men? Well, in some distorted way that may be true. However, is it really love, at least on the part of the person who is being abusive in some way? Is it real love when you are inflicting a serious addiction into a relationship, or family? Is it love when you're sleeping with someone else? No, I would have to believe that the real reason here is a serious self-esteem problem on the part of the woman.

People who feel good about themselves, and have healthy thinking, instinctively know that they should be treated with a certain level of respect, regardless of their financial situation. People that are willing to "Sell" away their self-respect have no understanding of this. Yes, it's true, story after story of women who take two jobs and clean toilets, but they don't do anything to undermine their self-respect, and the respect they receive from others.

So then what's the solution? Well, there may not be one. First, a woman would have to recognize that what she is doing is undermining her self-esteem. If someone is in denial, this may never happen. For those women who are willing to at least admit to themselves what they are doing, may have a chance with some good counseling. We must remember though, if the pay-off the woman is receiving is important enough to her, she may never want to change the situation. Although this may be shocking, or disdainful to those of us who would never even think about selling ourselves for a better lifestyle, there are just as many who will.

Always remember, just because something may need to be changed in a person's life, that doesn't mean the person wants the change to be made. This is better known as a "Pay-off", for that which is willingly sacrificed!