Senior Health Care at Home

Mom can't do for herself like she once did. Her thoughts are not sequential, and her understanding not clear. She went downtown for a ladies meeting and could not get back home. She has been a member of this ladies' society for over forty years; first Tuesday of the month, noon lunch and business meeting. There go the keys to the car, and there goes a part of Mom that will never return.

My brothers and I could see it coming, but all of a sudden it was here. Mom has some form of dementia along with an open heart surgery history, and she battles tachycardia. Also thrown in there is a little arthritis, acid reflux, edema, gingivitis, cataracts, etc. All of this from a retired nurse who did not take care as well she gave care.

Seeing her frail and vulnerable does not fit my vision of my mom. The woman that brought me into this world was strong, sturdy, well educated, bright, intense, powerful, convincing, persuasive, dedicated, firm and zealous. Her organizational and leadership skills out shined anyone in our hometown. People from across our state sought her opinions and assistance. She was often asked to run for public office, but she felt that her influence was better served with no political IOUs on the books.

Did I mention I was delivered in an ambulance? In my day that was a hearse from the local funeral home. On Thanksgiving Day, my doctor was in New York attending the Army / Navy game. He told my mom she would be fine while he was away, not. My grandmother called a mid-wife, the funeral home (for the ambulance) and off we went. My mom is one of a kind. By the way, my mom was 15 years old when she had me.

We have been in and out of hospitals and rehabilitation facilities. After months of home care assistance, Mom came home, to me. She needs handrails for support, not only in the bath area but other areas around the house and yard. We use special aids such as shower chairs, potty chairs, drinking cups, reinforced under garments for accidents, bed protectors, special chairs, battery-powered scooter, and a special needs' walk way path just for her. To say the least, our lifestyle has changed.

I prepare healthy meals for Mom (Doctors and common sense provide menu guide). She has her chair and table in her little space, but if we all dine together, she is with the family. There is an order to everything we do. We try not to vary our routine as to not add any confusion. However, our children and grandchildren drop in spontaneously. Mom always smiles and looks very content when the children are here. There is a weekly trip to the hair dresser, including manicures and pedicures. Then we have, lunch at some of her favorite restaurants seems to relax her. We go to major shopping venues. She drives a motorized shopping cart. We had a little trouble with back and forward handles, but so far, no one has sued us.

If this seems to be heading your way, read up now.

A couple of reminders:
Get Power of Attorney (Without it could render family helpless in any decision making)
Know insurance coverage (Medicare, Prescriptions and Supplemental Policies as in Blue Cross Blue Shield)
Know the Doctors and office visit history
Medications
Life Insurance Policies
Living Wills
Car Payment (?)
Car Insurance
Mortgage Details
Check with Creditors
Stock Plans
Retirements Pensions
401-K
Trusts
IRAs
CDs
Savings Account/s
Safety Deposit Box (Get joint authorization.)
Lawyers
Minister
Friends (They can tell you many things that you did not know.)
Pre-paid Funeral Arrangements
Check every nook and cranny in the house. (We were shocked at what we found)

Organizations are ready to help you.
Contact:
Senior or Silver groups.
Home Assistance for Seniors
Day Care Sitter - Local churches have great senior day care programs.
AARP provides helpful information.
Council on Aging offers:
Home Care
Meals on Wheels
. Help with bathing and lifting

All of this takes time and lots of it. If you are prepared, it is easier; for you and your parent/s.