Sense and Sensibility: An Analysis of Pretense, Propriety, and Pain

In a world where women are objects, men are honor-bound gentlemen, and society as a whole is deeply focused on propriety, there is little leeway for the ordinary individual to behave in a way that is merely human. Unable to answer to one's own emotions, create one's own path in life, or pursue one's own romantic interests, existence in such a society can be a social and psychological detriment. Some, however, rebel against such stringent rules, and run against the grain of their society, ignoring their culture's pretensions in order to live by their own rules. The world of Elinor and Marianne Dashwood, who are suspended in Regency-era England, is teeming with these oppressive principles. The two are sisters with opposite personalities, whose father recently passed away and, subsequently, whose fortunes are now rapidly changing for the worse. The story follows the girls, their mother, their younger sister, and their various romances and friendships as they endure the trials of this difficult time. Jane Austen's Sense and Sensibility depicts a world overrun by stifling societal norms which the two eldest Dashwood girls interpret in two very different ways.

Though they live together and meet many of the same people, the girls develop romantic attachments to two very different men, revealing each girl's respect, or lack thereof, for the popular conventions of acceptable matchmaking. Marianne's first romantic attraction in the novel is to Mr. Willoughby, a man who is socially disagreeable for reasons Elinor recognizes shortly after making his acquaintance:

Elinor saw nothing to censure in him but a propensity...of saying too much what he thought on every occasion, without attention to persons or circumstances. In hastily forming and giving his opinion of other people, in sacrificing general politeness to the enjoyment of undivided attention where his heart was engaged, and in slighting too easily the forms of worldly propriety...(38).

Elinor mentally reproaches the unacceptable object of Marianne's affection for his lack of propriety, restraint, and respect of social order. These qualities which are so abominable to Elinor actually endear Marianne to the man further, for she admires his pride and lack of restraint, both being vices of which she also is guilty. While Marianne chooses an unruly rebel for her beau, her sister's choice displays far more restraint in society, and enjoys much more respect. After spending a great deal of time alone with him in the home that her half-brother, Mr. John Dashwood, had recently inherited from their father, Elinor became enamored with Mr. Edward Ferrars, and spoke warmly of his manners to her sister: '"I venture to pronounce that his mind is well-informed, enjoyment of books exceedingly great, his imagination lively, his observation just and correct, and his taste delicate and pure" (16). Elinor's romantic interests are drawn to the more respected and more socially acceptable Mr. Ferrars, who is neither as offensive nor as proud as Marianne's lover. Mr. Ferrars is characterized as one who possesses 'delicate and pure' taste, and, when such a man is compared to one who slights "too easily the forms of worldly propriety," an image is created of Ferrars as a righteous, chivalrous man. This image parallels how he is perceived by the whole of his society, the only eyes critical of him being those of his easily discontented immediate family. It cannot be said, of course, that Elinor's romantic feelings are based entirely on what her peers will find acceptable; after all, one can hardly be held accountable for decisions made with the heart. Elinor is, however, extremely aware of the wisdom of her choice compared with that of her younger sister, her willingness to reproach Mr. Willoughby providing sufficient evidence of his profound unpopularity in society.

While thoroughly divided in matters of romantic preference, the girls also differ in terms of social etiquette, each with her own interpretation of which actions are, and are not, acceptable amongst refined society. Only a few days after meeting Mr. Willoughby, Marianne engages him in a lengthy conversation, during which she tactlessly entertains topics ranging from the mundane to the somewhat personal. Comprehending the lack of propriety shown by her sister due to the length and depth of the exchange, Elinor scolds Marianne on grounds of etiquette, and Marianne's sarcastic reply to the rebuff is a thorough insight into her own notions of what demands and restrictions popular attitudes place upon her socially:

"I have been too much at my ease, too happy, too frank. I have erred against every common-place notion of decorum; I have been open and sincere where I ought to have been reserved, spiritless, dull, and deceitful--had I talked only of the weather and the roads, and had I spoken only once in ten minutes, this reproach would have been spared" (37).

Marianne clearly understands what sort of behavior is required according to "common-place decorum," but her own desire for lively, engaging conversations with close friends leads her to ignore the moderate behavior that society would require of a woman her age. Her vivacious and revealing exchange with Willoughby exposes her nonconformist side, and her lust for 'sensibility.' Marianne takes pride in her ability to disregard her culture's stringent restrictions, and maintain a fleeting degree of individuality in this oppressive, stagnant population. Though Marianne is exhausted with society's rules to the point of mutiny, her sister is focused upon sense more than sensibility, and is willing to endure a little exasperation to observe the actions she feels will better keep her community in balance. When, after a long absence, Mr. Ferrars pays a visit to the Dashwood residence in somewhat low spirits, Elinor makes a point of maintaining her composure in the interest of social convention, despite the regret she feels at being unable to express her true emotions to him:

"...directing her attention to [Edward], [Elinor] endeavoured to support something like discourse with him... His coldness and reserve mortified her severely; she was vexed and half angry; but resolving to regulate her behaviour to him by the past rather than the present, she avoided every appearance of resentment or displeasure, and treated him as she thought he ought to be treated from the family connection" (67).

Elinor is possessed of a powerful need to maintain the rigid social decorum prescribed by her society, and refuses to knowingly upset anyone by being overly direct or emotional, resolving instead to deny her own true feelings, and tell people only what she believes it is thoroughly polite of her to say. Elinor has a prevailing tendency to place the needs of others, as well as the needs of her community, before her own desires. Despite Elinor's own emotional turmoil she is, "to be the comforter of others in her own distress, no less than in theirs" (196). Though it could be argued that this sort of self-denial could cause severe emotional damage to Elinor later on, it is, psychological damages notwithstanding, the perfect indication that Elinor is truly a complete foil to her sister, conforming to the role given to her by society to the point where she loses a conscious concern about her own well-being, and habitually places others first.

The vast discrepancy between each girl's understanding of social protocol relates not only to their platonic interactions, but also to their romantic connections, and more specifically, they way they behave when confronted with disappointment in love. Both girls encounter periods of deep sorrow in their respective relationships; for Marianne, this sorrow manifests after she is slighted by Willoughby, who, after his risqué past is revealed, is forced into a more advantageous marriage in order to salvage his prospects. Marianne's method of coping with this disappointment is extremely tasteless, even childish:

"[Marianne] was awake the whole night, and she wept the greatest part of it. She got up with a headache, was unable to talk, and unwilling to take any nourishment; giving pain every moment to her mother and sisters, and forbidding all attempt at consolation from either" (63).

Marianne's infantile actions demonstrate her lack of interest in the decorum required of a woman her age in this situation, which would dictate that she behave with restraint and composure. Marianne is free with her emotions, and has a tendency to disregard the impact her ostentatious misery has on others, in this case, upsetting her family members with her unbridled distress. Unlike Marianne, Elinor's specific romantic slight was the product of poor communication between her and her would-be lover Edward Ferrars, who was secretly engaged for four years. When Elinor became aware of the secret engagement, and, subsequently, Edward's inability to commit himself to her romantically, she kept her composure and suffered in silence, never making her despair known to her family:

"...when she joined [her family] at dinner only two hours after she had first suffered the extinction of all her dearest hopes, no one would have supposed from the appearance of the sisters, that Elinor was mourning in secret over obstacles which must divide her for ever from the object of her love" (104).

By keeping her sorrows to herself so as to not burden her family or acquaintances with her troubles, Elinor is once again doing what her society insists is proper for a woman in her position by making her own emotional well-being her last priority. Elinor utilizes more mature, refined methods of coping with her emotional distress, favoring discreet emotional outlets over conspicuous, desperate displays.

Elinor and Marianne Dashwood are two very different young women, living in the same society of strict rules and pretentious standards. Marianne finds it difficult to conform to society's rules, and is driven by the desires of her heart toward dramatic emotions and unconventional attitudes. Elinor observes the sound common sense inherent in her society's rules, and enjoys a relatively good reputation as a result of following them. The two Dashwood women relate to their society in terms of romance, etiquette, and sorrow, each dealing with the restrictions and conventions of their honor-based, propriety-focused society in the best way they see fit.

Works Cited

Austen, Jane. Sense and Sensibility. Ed. R. W. Chapman. 3^rd ed. Oxford: OUP, 1933.