Sept. 11, 2001, How I Hate Thee

I actually had to look it up to see what day it had fallen on. I was still working third shift at a local super-center and clearly recall sitting on the couch watching the news, things were still a mystery. The attack had no immediate effect on my life, but would come later. I went to work that evening as normal.

Before Sept. 11, 2001, I was very interested in government conspiracy theories and a supposed "Rising of the People" that was surely soon to come. The "uprising" was supposed to remove all of the crookedness that had infested our government. Conspiracies had such a hold on me that when I first heard about the Sept. 11, 2001 "bombing", I smiled and said to myself, "Finally, it's beginning". I had recently read about how the World Trade Organization was responsible for much of the suffering around the globe and thought the trade center was a suitable place to begin the "People's Uprising." It is difficult to describe just how flawed my state of mind was before Sept. 11, 2001.

Then talk began to spread that the Sept. 11, 2001 "bombing" was not a bombing at all, but an outright attack from foreign combatants. I remember becoming alarmed, but not for the reasons that I should have. I had become concerned that the Sept. 11, 2001 incident was not that of an American group attempting to bring justice to political criminals. In my flawed state of mind, I believed that it was not fair that a group of foreign terrorists instigated the attack on Sept. 11, 2001.

Then I saw the towers tumble.

I saw the Sept. 11, 2001 body count begin to rise, reaching an estimation of 10,000 victims before it began to fall. I remember thinking, "No, this is not how I imagined things would be, it was supposed to be Americans who struck against the government. It was supposed to be politicians and bankers, not average citizens trying to earn a living..."

Before Sept. 11, 2001 Americans had the Constitutional right to take up arms against a corrupt government. If ever there really was a chance of that happening, the window of opportunity was closed on Sept. 11, 2001. I will not bother citing the Patriot Act or Homeland Security initiatives that were quickly established after Sept. 11, 2001, you have heard all about them for almost seven years. I do not have to cite how nearly every small town in America, after Sept. 11, 2001, now has the equivalent of a S.W.A.T. unit waiting to kick down your door. Security cameras are going up at every street corner and intersection. The F.B.I. and other security organizations are listening to our phone calls.

After Sept. 11, 2001, our government promised to make us all safer, but I feel more paranoid than ever. I fear that because of Sept. 11, 2001, this very article will begin a series of events that will have me removed from my family and taken to some unknown location where I may or may not spend the rest of my life or be executed for high treason, simply for being in the wrong frame of mind seven years ago.

I have never joined a revolution group, not before Sept. 11, 2001 and not after. But sometimes I wonder if maybe I should have. But then, I remind myself that because of Sept. 11, 2001 our President wrote himself some executive powers that could potentially see him become our first permanent President. I remind myself that Americans all across the country support this document.

I want to believe that the United States of America has not yet fallen so far from its Constitutional heritage that it cannot be salvaged. I want to believe, but after Sept. 11, 2001, it seems that I would only be lying to myself.

I do not mourn on the anniversary of Sept. 11, 2001. I become excited with rage and a deep, resounding hatred of all that has become of this nation since then.