Sex and the Art of Baby Making

Despite advances in reproductive medicine, sex remains the most popular and widely used method of conception. This is good news indeed!

But did you know that for a healthy couple the chance of conception through a single act of intercourse is in the order of 1-3%? According to many fertility experts on of the most worrying aspects of delayed conception is that couples are simply not having enough sex. It is understandable, of course. Often the couple would be older and settled in their relationship. They lead busy lives and sex becomes something better enjoyed on weekends and vacations.

Nothing extinguishes the ardor quicker than baby making sex, especially after a few months. It becomes work, science, a dreaded chore and often a bone of contention in the relationship. Let's face it, douching, taking the temperature, fiddling with sperm-friendly lubricant and putting one's legs up afterwards are not conducive to hot, breathless passion! You really can't blame the male partner for feeling like a sperm donor!

So how often should you make love to optimize your chances of conception? Dr. Michael Dooley, author of Fit for Fertility (Hodder Mobius, 2006), recommends having intercourse three times per week, spread out over the week. No binge-bonking over weekends! This is the optimum frequency for sperm production and is very likely to catch a newly hatched egg.

There is mounting evidence that some women may in fact ovulate more than once per cycle. In that case, concentrating all your efforts on the date dictated by your, or your cycle planner, may be a bit like, well, putting all your eggs in one basket. A friend of mine recently announced a pregnancy that could not have resulted from her primary ovulation. As the scientists learn more, we'll be able to change our strategies, but until then you should cover your bases by having frequent intercourse.

Are there any sexual positions that are better for conception than others? Actually there are. Think gravity! The more horizontal the woman, the better. Position that allow for deeper penetration are also preferable to ensure that sperm is deposited as close to the cervix as possible. Avoid jumping up immediately after making love. Stay down for 20-30 minutes if possible. A pillow under the buttocks is also helpful.

A little known fact, and great news for women, is that if you have an orgasm after your partner has ejaculated the contractions of your uterus and vagina help to create a kind of partial vacuum, which draws the sperm into the cervix.

Another thing, which most doctors would describe as totally unscientific and purely anecdotal, is douching with bicarbonate of soda (baking soda or sodium bicarbonate). The cervical environment is often too acidic and kills the sperm, which like a slightly alkaline environment. If you are eating a diet high in processed, cooked food, sugar, starches, dairy and meat, all of which are acid forming, you should try using baking soda! Simply dissolve 2 Tablespoons of baking soda in a cup of warm water (not scalding!), and insert the solution into your vagina with a bulb syringe. It's not sexy, but I have two cousins who were conceived courtesy of this folk remedy. And it sure is cheaper than IUI (Intra Uterine Insemination, previously called Artificial Insemination), which is the conventional way of dealing with a hostile cervical environment.

There are some sperm-friendly lubricants on the market, and you will find them easily through Google. They are a pleasure to use!

So ladies, get some lingerie, candles, massage oil and get your hubby committed to the process again. The more get-togethers you have for sperm and eggs, the better your chances that they might actually hit it off and make a baby!