Sex in the Daily Life of Romans:

There is no doubt you've seen the stereotypical Roman orgy with about a dozen half-naked to fully naked people lying around a room with attractive slaves feeding them grapes as they lounge around to music, drink wine, and have a general, physically promiscuous time. The only problem with this stereotype is that, contrary to the idea that it has no foundation, this is actually a rather tame example. This specific description would have told the story of a rather low-end party, one that did more harm to the reputation of the host than benefit.

Sex was a topic of absolute confidence in the Roman Empire - there was no bashfulness or shyness concerning topics of promiscuity. The city of Pompeii, forever trapped in state thanks to Mount Vesuvias, has shown us a glimpse of all of this. Archaeologists were at first baffled by the displays of what could only be described as pornography on a certain wall that they'd discovered. Perhaps it was simply lewd art, some reasoned, until it was realized that this seemingly obscene display was actually a menu for one of Pompeii's many brothels.

This was consistent with Roman culture, where the capitol itself was covered with artwork of penises and large phallused, self-groping gods that were meant to bring good luck to the holder.

Orgies were often thrown throughout the city - ranging from the lowly plebeians to rich aristocratic patricians who wanted to show off their wealth in what we would see as vulgar displays of fornication.

Amusingly, in spite of this rampant physical display of sexual pleasure, there were strict morality codes that stoic Romans were expected to adhere by. For example, oral sex was seen as outright filthy, and Augustus took several steps to try and ban overly explicit sexual practices. The attempts mostly failed however - as even the "dirty" oral sex was seen as simply that, a carnal pleasure to be enjoyed with the negative consequence of being dirty.

In many ways, the topic of sex was difficult to avoid in the city of Rome. With a phallus on a door seen as a good luck charm and a brothel on every corner (or so it seemed), it would become ingrained in social lives. Sex was not just carried out with the conventional man-woman coitus we're used to today, but would involve any number of either gender thrown into the mix.

This is where one of the most peculiar elements of Rome's culture comes into play. While the Romans long had a distaste for the Greeks, referring to them as effeminate and mocking their boy loving as a matter of course, they partook shamelessly in bisexual relationships with their own slaves and catamites. If challenged on this, however, the response was a simple guffaw. They weren't being gay - as we see "gay" by today's standards - because, in their minds, they were not the ones receiving. Therefore, by being the dominant one in a homosexual relationship, a Roman man was maintaining his masculinity and receiving his own sexual pleasure.

Therefore, he was eminently better than the Greek, who was encouraged to partake in actual, loving relationships with their fellow soldiers.

This seemingly bizarre ritual of homosexuality was challenged by the fact that Rome did not officially recognize the legal status of homosexual couples - that is, a couple that married exclusively due to their attraction to one another. In the Roman Republic and later Empire, where marriage meant a number of legally binding benefits, marriage was strictly reserved for one man and one woman only. Polygamy was out of the question.

This did not mean that men weren't encouraged to go purchase catamites from the local slave market, however, to use as they willed.

Roman sexual practices are a sometimes difficult concept for many to study, and the reality is often watered down by modern sensibilities or conservative values that see them as almost barbaric. One particularly famous incident involved a family member of Emperor Nero partaking in race with another woman, to see who could sleep with the most men in a single night.

Sex was simply a part of daily life in ancient Rome - one could not escape it, even if they wanted to.

Sources:

http://www.unrv.com/book-review/roman-sex.php
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cleopatra_VII