Sheryl Crow Says: One Square of Toilet Paper Only!
"I have spent the better part of this tour trying to come up with easy ways for us all to become a part of the solution to global warming. Although my ideas are in the earliest stages of development, they are, in my mind, worth investigating. One of my favorites is in the area of conserving trees which we heavily rely on for oxygen. I propose a limitation be put on how many squares of toilet paper can be used in any one sitting. Now, I don't want to rob any law-abiding American of his or her God-given rights, but I think we are an industrious enough people that we can make it work with only one square per restroom visit, except, of course, on those pesky occasions where 2 to 3 could be required."
Crow is not the first to consider the possibility that toilet paper might be one of the root causes of the .6 degrees (Celsius) the Earth has warmed over the past century. Last month, the New York Times featured a family living in Manhattan - Colin Beaven, Michelle Conlin, and their 2-year-old daughter Isabelle - which is attempting a year-long project they call "No Impact." The goal of the project is to live an entire year without making any impact on the environment.
According to the New York Times article, this involves the family eating only organically grown food (grown within 250 miles of Manhattan), no shopping for anything except food, producing no trash except compost, no carbon-based transportation and no paper use.
The lack of paper is perhaps the most difficult. Not only because both parents work in publishing (he is a writer of historical nonfiction and she is a writer at Business Week), but because the ban on paper includes toilet paper. As the author of the article says, "Nothing is a substitute for toilet paper, by the way; think of bowls of water and lots of air drying."
Although the gesture is noble, of course, one has to wonder exactly how effective it is. The 250 mile rule for food purchasing is the distance the family feels a farmer can drive in a car from the country in one day, while a loophole exists that allows the family to accept gifts. Still, their complete lack of toilet paper is impressive, as is Sheryl Crow's single square of toilet paper per bathroom visit, if - one assumes - just a tad bit smelly.
Sources:
NY Times
http://www.sherylcrow.com/news.aspx?nid=7786
Published by Eric Fleming - Featured Contributor in Technology
I've worn many work hats. I've worked as a choir director and piano instructor. I've worked in a computer lab and a bookstore. I've sold sheet music, band instruments and guitars. I have managed a Google... View profile
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71 Comments
Post a CommentYou know what's green? Probably her crotch.....disgusting. You need more than one square to properly wipe.
Unsanitary to the point of filthiness. What a moron.
Disgusting.
still green that is just gross. What do you do when it is messy and/or diarrhea???
My wife and I now "wipe" without ANY toilet paper, and we've never been cleaner. Google "the worlds best toilet seat" to find out how.
So that's how Sheryl does it. ATTENTION! Sheryl Crow fans please take this into consideration if you meet her. (I would not shake her hand)
Sheryl Crow is a d!pSh!t. She's traveling around in private jets to joke her crappy songs and she's telling other people to use one square of toilet paper.
There is an effective way to use just one square. This has saved me so much $$ over the years.
I simply tear a small finger-sized hole in the middle of the toilet paper square.
I then insert a finger through the hole, and wipe my anus with my finger tip.
Then what remains of the square is used to wipe my finger, and scrape under the fingernail. If you wash your hand immediately, it's actually quite hygienic.
As a restaurant chef, hygiene is a big concern to me.
Seriously, give it a try....you won't regret it.
I proudly use at least a dozen squares each time I take a crap. I use the good charmin too. God bless the people that came up with Charmin, feels like I am wiping my hiney with a soft, white cloud!
I cannot use only one square of toilet paper. I have to have a few squares! I would like to know if Sheryl Crow is actually able to do this every day. I don't see it happening! :)