Shopping at Circuit City: A Customer Service Associate's Guide

1. When you call to see if your item you bought, that wasn't in stock when you came to the store is in store now, always have your receipt. If I have to look up your receipt it is only going to make me more angry and I may put you on hold for a few minutes, if not 15.

2. Do Not and I repeat DO NOT swear at me while on the phone or in the store. If you swear at me and then ask for a manager and you are on the phone, I will put you on hold and make sure I keep you on hold for atleast thirty minutes. If you swear at me in store, I will ask you to leave the store, before we physically remove you from the store.

3. Don't throw a hissy-fit when you have to wait in line for a few minutes to ring out. There are other customers other then you and they were surely in line before you were.

4. Don't threaten us by saying "I'm going to Best Buy." Personally, I don't give a damn if you shop there, or at Circuit City. I still get my paycheck regardless of what you do.

5. Speaking of paychecks, IDO NOT GET COMISSION, GET THAT THROUGH YOUR HEAD!

6. If I have to get a manager to do something with your transaction, don't get huffy and try to get angry, I will only take longer to find the manager.

7. If I tell you that the item you are returning is over two months old, don't give me the bullshit excuse that you just opened it. It isn't my fucking fault that you buy something and open it 2 months later. We will not return it, get over it, you dumbass.

8. The protection plan normally means that we will send it out to get serviced, better then nothing though.

9. Don't call the store to check if a dvd is in stock, when you can check online.

10. Infact, don't call me and say "It said in stock online but I wanted to make sure it really was." The website is updated hourly and you DO NOT need to call to check and see if it really is.

11. Don't call for hours, they are online too.

12. Don't call me for directions to my store, it's called mapquest.com. Use it you dumbfuck.

13. Don't get upset when an associate isn't in their section, simply ask someone else NICELY if you will be able to help you.

14. Even though I work at circuit city, I don't know everything about all electronics, so when I say I don't know, please don't get pissy

15. Don't call it something other then Firedog. It isn't dogfire, catdog, catfire, firething, fireplace, dogthing, etc.

16. When Firedog doesn't answer your phone call, don't get mad at me, get mad at them.

17. If you can't work the phone system you are a retard

18. Don't tell me we need to adjust our hours, that is a corporate decision, not mine.

19. Don't get mad when i ask you if you really want a bag?

20. Finally just be nice, smile, be polite and patient, and you will get the best damn service you have ever recieved.....