Short Story Based on a Photo: The Rabbit in Wonderland

I'm just an ordinary rabbit, ya know? Long ears, brown fur, fluffy tail. Oh yeah, and buck teeth. Got a wife and kids. Lots of kids. So there I was, minding my own business-visiting with the Caterpillar-when this chick named Alice came flying down the hole. At first I thought maybe we had a batch of bad weed. Caterpillar's never been real careful about what he dumps in that hookah. One time he accidentally put in pickle juice and my powder puff stayed puckered for days.

But that's off the subject ....

So, this chick, Alice-yeah, you've seen her before, blond hair done in curls, wears a dress and black, patent leather shoes-this chick landed with a thump right on top of my cousin. Which cousin? Well, I guess I do have quite a few, but it was my albino cousin, the one that carries a big watch in his pocket. And at least one good thing came from that. The sucker quit saying, "I'm late, I'm late for a very important date." That line of his was getting to be just a little annoying.

We tried shoving that blond space queen and her black patent leather shoes back up the rabbit hole, but she wasn't buying. Kept hollering about some dudes named Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum. I guessed she'd been doing acid and was having a bad trip.

Talk about freaky though-when she pointed at the Caterpillar and screamed, "Off with her head," it scared the crud out of him. Not that the Caterpillar is a she ... but, well ... he's one of those whose gate swings both ways. Come to think of it, maybe he did have his blond wig and red, spiked heels on at the time. Cheeze-o-flip, I tell you, I'm glad I don't pay the bills at his house. Red spiked heels for all thirty of his feet can't be cheap, right? The wig and heels must be what confused the chick. Caterpillar's so far out, he's a trip all by himself.

Anyway, we finally managed to push that wild woman, screaming and shoving, out the back door. Man, it hurt when she kicked me; it wouldn't have surprised me if she gave me a hare-line fracture.

I gotta say, it was one of those things you'd never believe unless you were there. In fact, the Cheshire Cat said it was so weird, I ought to write a book about it. 'Cuz, ya know, it'd definitely be a best seller.

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Sources:
Cindy Lynn's imagination