Should Children Have a Say in Family Decisions?

What kind of decisions? Major home repairs? Job transfers? Relocating? Or what to have for dinner? How old are the children in question? What does a ten-year-old know about the details surrounding the decision as to whether or not a minivan would be a better vehicle for your family than an economy car?

Family decisions suggest major decisions. Having a "say " suggests they have an equal voice in the decision. Children should be included only for their opinion, but they should know the parents are the ones who make the decisions. Families should not be a democracy. They should be a total dictatorship where the parents rule. Parents are supposed to make the decisions for the children until the child reaches adulthood.

There may be some situations where parents want to know how the children feel concerning a major decision they may be facing to help them decide. However, letting the child believe that his or her say would in any way carry any weight in the decision making is outright foolish. It will open the doors to a number of problems such as when a decision turns out to be wrong and the child says, "I told you so." Do you realize how that makes you look to your child?

Children should have no say in family decisions. Parents are their guiding factors. Major decisions come with major responsibilities and consequences. Since the child faces none of those things regardless of the decision, they have nothing to lose. They are simply unqualified to make those types of decisions.

It is understandable that a parent may want to make the children feel included in family issues, but the child should be aware of the fact that the decision lies with the parent. It's not their place. Even when it comes to something as simple as where to go for dinner.

You ask the children where they would like to go. They say pizza. You remind them that they had pizza the previous night. After a bit of whining and arguing, the parent makes the decision. If they had simply made the decision in the first place all of that could have been avoided. It's their job as a parent. The family should not be a democracy, it should be a dictatorship where the parents rule; just as the children will rule their families once they are mature enough to handle the responsibility.