Should You Date Your Best Friend's Ex?

From a Guys Perspective

Josh Mason
The argument about whether or not to date your best friends ex is an age-old debate. Man code dictates that the ex is off limits, unless of course your friend encourages it. Dating your friends ex can be rewarding, especially if you are already close and have good chemistry. However, it can lead to complications, jealousy and the loss of your best friend.

You can date your best friends ex if...

Your Friend is Okay with the Arrangement

The safe bet is to ask your friend how he feels about dating his ex. If the breakup was mutual and there are no lingering feelings between the former couple, then it is a safe bet he will be okay with it.

It Was a Short-term Relationship

Short-term or casual relationships last for about a month or two and involve no serious feelings. If this is the case, most friends will not mind if you are dating their ex. Yet again, always ask first, but most of the time guys are okay with the idea.

You Two Have Good Chemistry

In the rare case that you are a better, match for your best friends ex than he was, then you may have to risk the friendship for love. However, make sure the relationship is what you really want because you could end up losing your best friend.

You should not date your best friends ex if...

It Was a Long-term Serious Relationship

No man that is serious about his former lover wants to see her with someone else, or at all for that matter. Men move on from the emotional stress of a breakup by avoiding contact with the ex. However, if your best friend starts to date your ex, it means you will be around her constantly again, but she is with someone else. Do not do this to your friend, especially if he is not okay with the arrangement.

Your Friend Has a Valid Reason

I used to have friends that would date my exes because they were already familiar with them. However, this is why they are former friends. After dealing with a bad breakup, it is hard for guys to know their former lover is with someone different, especially your best friend.

Your Friend Shared Detailed Intimate Information

Guys talk about their sex life just about as much and as casually as they talk about sports. Most of the time we share the most intimate details in a purely physical sense. If you know all the detail about your friends ex you may feel uncomfortable or jealous down the road. Don't do this to yourself or your friend. If you do decide to date your friends ex, never share details of your sex life with your friend it will ruin the friendship.

Published by Josh Mason - Featured Contributor in Lifestyle

Based in Durham, NH., Josh Mason has been writing professionally online since 2009. Mason specializes in technology, home improvement, gardening, relationships and product reviews. His works have appeared on...  View profile

1 Comments

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  • Sandy James12/28/2010

    Tough question, but I would never date my best friend's ex. Too many problems.

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