Should I Put My Pet to Sleep?

Not every child [or every adult] is lucky enough to have a pet. Some people are unable or unwilling to include pets in their home. For those of us who do own pets, they remain our constant companions and substantially enrich our lives.

In my family we always owned pets: dogs, cats, snakes, hamsters, goldfish, chinchillas, you name it. As most pet owners, we regarded these animals as parts of the family. They also became part of my childhood and my brother's childhood. The bookends of the lives of any one of our cats, for instance, marked a certain period in each of our lives. I can drum up memories from each and every one of the pets I had as a child. I regard this as a privilege.

It was from these pets, that we first understood the responsibilities for caring for another being. It's also from relationships with pets and other animals in nature that we learn one of our most valuable lessons: Life is fleeting.

We once had a Siamese cat named Ashley that was having severe health issues. She wasn't eating and had trouble walking. My mom spent hundreds of dollars trying to get Ashley healthy again. The special diets and vet prescribed medications did very little and expenses were getting out of hand. It came to a point where the vet had to show my mom how to hydrate the cat at home. I remember Ashley lying on the floor, silent, as my mom hooked up the hydration bag and tried to find a suitable area to insert the needle. This went on for months. Ashley was never the same again and neither were we. Not surprisingly, she passed away. Looking back I wonder, were we trying to save her or were we trying to save ourselves from the grief of saying goodbye?

It's safe to say that the vast majority of pet owners will outlive several dogs or cats in their lifetime. Sometimes pets run away or have accidents. Much of the time, however, they grow old just like us. Years pass, and we look at them and realize that we, too, have grown older. A pet can join us throughout any number of chapters in our life story. We take for granted that they'll always be there. Then something happens: disease, a devastating injury, or simply old age. In those times, we are faced with agonizing decisions to make about the fate of our pets. These decisions, surrounded by the memories that precede them, is why films like Marley & Me touch an emotional nerve with anybody who has ever owned a pet.

More recently, I helped a friend make a different, yet difficult choice. His cat, Boo-Boo, had been coughing incessantly for months. Then, Boo-Boo started losing tremendous amounts of weight. He ate normally, yet he was hungry all the time. The vet had given him some shots that worked for awhile and his symptoms seemed to lessen. One morning, unexpectedly, there was a mysterious puddle of blood on the steps upstairs and blood smeared along the garage floor leading to the litter box. It was that morning, we discovered that Boo-Boo was having tremendous difficulty urinating. All that came was liquid laced with blood. We feared kidney failure.

At one vet, they agreed that kidney failure was likely, but more tests and X-rays would be needed to confirm it. We had to think of reality from different reference points'"one being: the continuing expense of veterinary care and two being: the harsh reality that Boo-Boo was an eighteen-year-old cat. He'd outlived many of his feline counterparts, probably outlived all the kittens from his litter. After much time considering the options, we decided that putting Boo-Boo to sleep was the most rational and humane decision we could make in this particular instance.

Costs and conditions for pet euthanasia vary. The first vet said he'd charge $80, but we wouldn't be able to accompany Boo-Boo in his final moments. For a companion that's been around for nearly twenty years of his life, my friend found this to be unbearable. Another vet the same day said the charge would be $130. They explained that it would be both quick and painless for Boo-Boo and we'd have the chance to say goodbye.

At the veterinary hospital, the staff was incredibly understanding. The relationship of pets and their owners is often an emotional one. My friend signed some paperwork authorizing the procedure. Soon after, the vet arrived, did some preparations and injected a drug in Boo-Boo's paw. Most vets use a euthanasia drug that consists of a barbituate that stops the heart and breathing. Within three seconds, Boo-Boo was gone. One moment, his greenish-hazel eyes are full of life. Then, with a flash, they cloud and turn clear'"vacant. For us, tears came naturally and forcefully in the minutes and hours afterward. It's amazing that pets can have some a profound impact on our lives and our feelings.

If you find yourself in similar circumstances with your pet and you make the decision to put them to sleep, here are some tips to help you get through it:

• 1) Be sure to choose a caring veterinarian and a pet hospital where both you and your pet feel as comfortable.
• 2) Understand that your decision is a valid one. It's a very personal decision that only you can make. Determine if your pet is in pain, having trouble with basic functions, and/or is old, injured, or unlikely to recover.
• 3) Allow yourself to mourn the loss of your pet. They were a part of your life for so many years and will remain part of your history for the years to come.
• 4) Seek assistance if you need to talk to someone. Remember your pet was part of your family. Pet grief counseling does exist. There are even pet loss and bereavement hotlines you can call.
• 5) Honor the life of your pet by keeping their memory alive. Some people keep photos of their pet. Others light a candle as part of a makeshift shrine. Still others purchase caskets for their pets or keep their cremated remains. Through The Association Of Pet Loss and Bereavement, you can even add an online pet memorial. Do what feels right for you. There's no wrong way to honor the life of your pet.