Should You Repair a Damaged Relationship?

Most relationships can be saved, and even repaired. But not all of them are worth the trouble.

Here are some things to consider when deciding whether to put forth the effort to mend a damaged relationship.

Depth of the Emotional Bond

Do you have deep emotional ties to the individual? Is the person a relative, close friend or co-worker? Are you likely to encounter this person on a regular basis? Is this a person you entrusted with your confidence?

If you have a close, longstanding relationship with the person, and you feel that something would be missing from your life without them, you should think carefully before ending the relationship without first attempting to resuscitate it.

Likelihood of Recurrences

Is the behavior that caused the rift likely to continue? If the person who offended you has a habit of engaging in the type of behavior you find hurtful, then there is a tremendous likelihood that the behaviors you find objectionable will continue for the duration of your relationship. Is this something you're willing to put up with?

Willingness of Both Parties to Work to Repair the Problem

Do you both have the maturity, desire and commitment necessary to fix the problem? If both of you are not willing to wholeheartedly commit to repairing the damage, rebuilding the relationship and moving forward, the relationship is doomed because you simply cannot maintain an interpersonal relationship by yourself.

The bottom line is you need to decide if the relationship will likely enhance or detract from your enjoyment of life if it is allowed to continue. If you think the relationship is worth saving, and your partner is willing to work as hard at saving it as you are, go for it! However, if you are not thoroughly convinced that your partner is willing to work as hard as you are to repair the damage, lick your wounds and walk away as you would only be setting yourself up for more heartbreak if you stayed in the relationship.

Whatever you decide to do, make sure your choice is one that will bring you joy!