Sideline Etiquette - How to Behave at a Youth Sporting Event

You've seen the video clips and read the newspapers - out-of-control parent freaks out at youth's soccer game. Increasingly, parents, coaches and other adults who should know better are displaying inappropriate behavior at youth sports events. While you may feel pretty confident that you know what constitutes crossing the line, you may not know exactly what good sideline etiquette entails. Here are some of the rules for spectators:

1. No pets. Many youth games and sports events take place in public spaces where pets may be allowed, others may occur on school grounds where pets may not be allowed. Either way, it doesn't matter if you think you have the most well-behaved dog on the strongest leash in town - don't bring them to a game. Pet owners seem to think that everyone loves pets and wants them around. A lot of people don't. Some children may have extreme anxiety around animals (big dogs especially) and you are interfering with someone else's enjoyment of the activity. It's just inconsiderate and bad manners.

2. Stay away from the coach and team. In soccer, it is customary that the teams and coaches get one side of the field and the spectators get the other. This doesn't always work out if there is seating on both sides (or in other sports where it isn't customary), but you should still make sure that you stay as far away from the team and coach as possible. The coach and the kids need to focus and stay on task and interfering parents and spectators produce a real distraction.

3. Don't coach from the sidelines. Imagine going to work and sitting at your desk and having 25 co-workers start to yell instructions and directions at you. Not a pleasant thought, is it? Children can become quite confused and stressed when they feel the tug between the coach's directions and mom's or dad's (or the seventeen other parents shouting directions.) Keep your comments to "yeah!" and "good job!" and don't try to shout strategy, orders, or rearrange players from your seat on the sidelines.

4. Stay off the field or court. No matter what, just don't go there. Okay, if your child gets a bloody nose or is injured and the coach turns to the crowd, looking wildly for the parents, then you can run out onto the field or court. Otherwise, just stay put - and be nice.

5. This brings me to the final "rule" - say nice things. Encourage and support both teams - these are kids, for goodness sake, and refrain from showing anger, disappointment, and barking and yelling. If this just "isn't in your nature," then you probably shouldn't be going to the event at all. Or, sit far off in the distance where your child knows you are there but not close enough to cause trouble. Congratulate all the kids after the game and both (or all of the coaches). This is what good sportsmanship is all about and it's one of the main reasons we encourage our kids to get involved in team activities. Remember, you are a role model and only you can control your own behavior.