Simba - a Dog Shares Her Experience of Being Put Down

The office was empty except for a small tiger cat and the old man god who held him. Still, the room was rich with the smells of the many animals and gods who had passed through over the past few days.

The gods were quiet and sad again today, even more so then they had been in the past few weeks. Simba was not sure why they had been so sad, but it troubled her deeply that she hadn't been able to soothe them.

The female god by her side seemed very upset and tense. Her smile was not there and the usually kind and loving eyes were now moist with unshed tears. Simba could sense the sadness in the other gods too, but not as much as in the female who had raised her and whom she loved.

The gods quietly led her past the waiting area and into a small room. Simba knew this room. It was in this same room that her boy had brought her when she was a puppy and where the man god that resided there had made her well, when her ear caused her so much pain.

Today, though, the room seemed different somehow. She sniffed the air for some sign of change but, nothing smelled out of place. It came to her slowly; the difference was not in the room, but, in the gods themselves. Something was very wrong.

The man god who had always helped her when she was ill put her on the cold table. Simba hated this table because it moved; it would rise into the air carrying her to the very faces of the gods themselves. It had always frightened her and made her uneasy.

She could smell the sorrow and pain coming from them, especially her female and it bothered her. The gods were sad and she couldn't seem to make it better for them, no matter how hard she tried.

Then, the man god patted her softly and turned to the counter. The female god she had known and loved all her life moved closer. The female patted her head and kissed her gently, then began speaking words only the gods could fully understand. They were kind words. Simba knew 'good girl', but the other words meant very little, except that they were sad words. She licked at the salty water falling from the female god's eyes. Perhaps the god was sick she thought as she tried to comfort her.

The man god came back to the table with the long silver pain in his hand. That was all she thought of it, Simba had had shots before. The needle sank deeply into her thigh. It stung a little then the spot became warm and in a second the pain was gone. The man god rubbed the spot softly and spoke gently to her.

She began to feel tired and laid down as her female god patted her. She could sense the fear and sorrow coming from the god. Sleep clouded her mind; it floated down on her slowly like a dream. Her eyes were getting heavier as she laid her head quietly on the table. She looked into the eyes of the gods and saw the sadness and regret through their tears.

Simba knew now why the gods were sad. Soon she would be no more and she knew now she would never see her boy again. She glanced around the room searching for the boy, but, she knew he was not there.

Her eyes met the eyes of the crying female god and she licked the god's hand trying to comfort her and with her eyes she said 'I know it's OK'.

Slowly, Simba sank into the peaceful quiet of sleep, to the small corner of heaven; the Gods themselves had set aside for dogs. There she would run, play and wait for her boy to come to her again.

As the darkness settled upon her, she thought of the boy, her boy, she would be with him again. It wouldn't be that long, she would wait.

This story is written in Loving Memory of Simba and her boy Nick.

10-17-97