Single Gamers: The Digital Life is Sometimes a Lonely One

As a single gamer, people ask why I don't have a boyfriend or why I'm not married yet.

I was recently talking to a fellow gaming friend who mentioned watching a show that stated it was harder for gamers to find their perfect mate. And sadly I had to agree and admitted that "yes ... a comic book collector probably gets more action than I do."

As I started to rethink my digital life I began to wonder what life would be like without my videogames and truthfully, it would have been horribly mundane. But as I thought about my digital life and ask myself why I'm and probably why the rest of the unlucky gamers in our community are still single, here is what I have come to realize.

1) We grow up playing the videogames as children because it was our way to pass time, relieve all the stresses built up from school and the kids we had to deal with from Monday through Friday whether we wanted to or not. Plus other children who either played games or were denied games thought we were cool and it felt good to have friends with common interests as they begged to visit you and play with you every chance they got.

2) As we graduate from high school all the things we enjoyed and thought were cool are no longer acceptable. We are told to grow up and leave our toys behind.

3) As we leave for college, we find there are still young adults like ourselves playing their games in their dorm rooms. So we break out our old game consoles and hooked it up and have gaming parties. Find a boyfriend who games and life was great.

4) As we near graduation, those who once gamed are now looking for excuses to admit they've grown up and are moving on with their lives. So you try to do the same because you don't want to be left behind in the adult world.

5) We found our first job and try to make enough money to survive the world we live in. We start spending the money on the necessities of life - rent, insurance, a car to drive, groceries, utilities and gas for your car. We spend our waking lives going to work, going home, eat, watch television and go to bed and on those occasions you find a man remotely interested in you. You go on dates.

You talk about your work, he talks about his work and you have the occasional intimate relationship with each other then after awhile you decide maybe he's not the one and go your separate ways. No evening kiss, no evening conversations and no sleepover. This becomes a ritual until you see a commercial for a new game console and all the marvelous videogames that you can buy with it. You try to flip the channel but the extraordinary graphics and enhanced technological game play features begins calling to you and you flip back.

6) After a month of seeing the same commercial you save up your money and buy the console. You tell the store clerk that its a birthday gift for a family member so the other customers don't look at you like a freak. You take it home, plug it in and you play and play and play. You remember how much fun it was to play your games and stare at amazement of how well the games have improved.

7) After three months your games are your pride and joy in life and you wonder why you ever stopped gaming. Now the daily routine includes gaming when you get home and start enjoying your life again, but soon you do feel the need to find a partner who enjoys the same things you do. So you go out on the weekends with hopes of finding someone with the same interests as you. After all, we have human needs and after awhile you tend to yearn for a companion to share the rest of your life with.

8) You meet others who claim they like videogames as much as you do, so you go out on dates and finally after a few dates you find one that could be a potential life mate and feel comfortable inviting him over for coffee or drinks and to play a few games.

9) At first they play your games and after a week or two they stop playing and claim they would rather watch you play. But even then they have something else in mind and because you want to be with them you figure ... okay. I can play my games later. Then the trouble begins as his attitude and interests change.

10) He finally proposes to you and you accept ... kind of ... you don't know what your feeling because this is no longer the same man that you wanted to date long ago. He claims he really doesn't mind if we play our games so to meet his needs as well as your own you make a schedule. Monday through Friday in the mornings at work, evenings doing some activity together and then on the weekends you play your videogames after the chores are all done.

11) Soon, they want more of your time to do the things he wants to do which creeps into your weekend gaming time and you start feeling betrayed. You fire up your game console and insert your favorite game into the disc drive and he complains that he's bored and want to go out. Simple request right? So you go out to the movies with them and come home. The game is still waiting for you, so you give him a kiss, tell him how much fun you had and rush into the recreation room to try and squeeze some game time into your day.

12) After a while your finacee starts finding more activities to do and even invites his and your parents out for an evening of dinner and a movie. You are however about to get married so you change your schedule and game in the evenings just before bed. This works out for a few more months and then it really goes downhill from there. Now you can't really remember the last time you got to play your games or even what game you were playing at the time. And as you sit down to play your games he finds more things to do and when you refuse and tell him you really need this break. He complains that you don't spend time with them.

13) Finally you get fed up with his antics as your wedding date arrives and if that isn't bad enough. You are forced to choose between spending the rest of your life married to him doing what he wants to do or spending the rest of your life single and playing your videogames alone. If you choose to marry him, you spend the rest of your life doing what they want to do with no consideration of your wants or needs. He will eventually find a way to throw away your game console or give it to one of his friends who has children.

If you choose your games over them, you spend your days going to work in the mornings and playing your games before bed. You still feel a bit lonely having lived with the man for awhile but you start to remember how much fun it was to be single. But eventually you want companionship again so you try to go out and find a real gamer as a potential partner. But unfortunately, you find they have chosen to marry the non-gamer and have decided to stop gaming for their partner's sake or they just broke off their engagement to a non-gamer and are just as burnt out about the ordeal as you are and have no desire in taking on a new relationship.

But now with more and more gamers taking pride in their digital gaming life that maybe there is hope for us single gamers.