Size Does Matter

Okay, guys. It's time that someone talked to you about that ever-increasing waistline of yours. You were doing great until you got out of college. You used to play sports and eat anything you wanted but now you do all of the latter and none of the former. You've gotten away unscathed for the most part, but I'm advocating for equal standards for healthy weight among men and women. I'm not married to an overweight man so I'm going to say what those wives who are married to large men want to say but can't. Consider this:

1. Your weight is affecting your sex life.

Do you realize that your size could literally and figuratively be getting in the way of sex? Figuratively so because you may be unsatisfied with the way you look. When that happens, you may become less interested in sex, which can affect the level of spice in the bedroom.

We usually hear about this happening to women but it's very possible for men to feel a bit unpretty (in the words of TLC) and unsexy at times, too. This can be a real drag when your wife still has the hots for you despite the fact that you've gotten heavier.

I don't think I need to elaborate on how your weight can literally get in your way. We're all adults, here.

2. She's worried about your health.

Your wife may have already verbally expressed her concern about your unhealthy weight but there may be more to it than what she's telling you. Are you the primary breadwinner in your home? Do you have adequate life insurance? If you haven't thought about these things, I'm willing to bet your wife has, especially in these uncertain financial times.

That may sound insensitive, but any good financial planner will advise you to manage your financial risk. It's a fact that being overweight, among other things, can increase the likelihood of an early death.

If that happens, what's going to happen to your family? Heart disease and cancer are the number one killers in this country today. Overweight increases the risk of both. Chew on that for a while (pun intended).

3. You're sabotaging her weight loss efforts.

I can't tell you how many times I've counseled women about changing their diets. I always ask them to identify what they perceive to be the biggest barrier to this process. At the top of the list is the fact that their husbands have zero interest in joining their efforts.

The result is the wives end up having to cook one meal for themselves and another one for their husband and children. This gets exhausting very quickly so they just give up. Another common scenario is when the wife makes healthy meals for the whole family but the husband turns his nose up at it and won't tolerate any changes to their usual and customary way of eating.

The third thing that can happen is, the wife buys and cooks healthy food but the husband keeps the kitchen stocked with junk that he says is for himself. We all know that you may buy it and bring it home because you like it, but if it's in the house, everyone is going to be tempted to eat it.

Being on a different page (or sometimes book) will sabotage the whole effort. Husbands often just do not have healthy lifestyle changes on their agenda. It has to be a family initiative or it will probably not work. This brings me to the final thought.

4. She resents the double standard.

Part of the reason that men don't feel a sense of urgency about losing weight is because they don't have the same standards for looks placed on them. Women can feel as if men get to be fat but women are expected to be thin. This is a very unfair double standard and it can cause resentment between the sexes.

Just some food for thought (yes, that pun was intended, too). Now, go have a serious conversation with your wife about supporting each other in making healthy lifestyle choices.