Small Town Class Reunion: The Event is Here!

The reunion was scheduled to coincide with the high school homecoming, and a community homecoming event known as Smiles Day. As it turned out, there were four or five other class reunions scheduled for the same evening. A lot of activity for a small town of 3,000.

Having remarried a short time ago, my spouse (and best friend) David, went with me. I'd very nearly missed the reunion by coming down with pneumonia just two weeks before. Luckily, I had recovered enough to go but still hadn't gotten my voice back completely. I doubted my friends would know what to think - me, speechless?

We checked in on Friday evening, and I called a couple of friends in town to let them know we'd arrived. We made plans to get together for breakfast the next day, just a quiet visit away from the big event on Saturday evening. Another friend called and invited us to a small get-together at a club in town. So off we went. We had a wonderful visit with just seven of us - six classmates and my husband. Turned out my best buddy Harry has a nearly photographic memory of everything that happened in high school. Of course, his memory might not be accurate, but none of us can dispute it because we don't remember at all!

And so it goes as we tell tales on each other of exploits and fun times and general high school craziness. The three guys were all on the football team and they proceeded to tell us of things the team did, wild exploits and specific plays from particular games. The three women present from this class were astounded! We'd never heard of these exploits. We considered the possibility we had attended a different high school! The things these guys did that the teachers and principal kept quiet in such a small town!!! Unbelievable. We even heard a story about how one of our classmates was very nearly killed by electrocution during one of their escapades! The next time someone says there could never be a conspiracy of silence because people can't keep a secret, I'm going to send them to talk to my high school buddies from the football team!

Next day, in the late afternoon, we went on a bus tour of town. Harry donated his tour bus and took us to view the new construction at the high school and the newly remodeled courthouse. It was a great opportunity to visit with even more people in a comfortable, air-conditioned bus. Not being able to walk that much due to recovery from my pneumonia, I stayed on the bus and got to visit with others who stayed on the bus - a blessing!

And then it was time for the reunion itself. The place we met has been used for years and years as a reception hall. I worked there as a teenager, serving at the banquets. Our hostesses did a spectacular job decorating. Group pictures were taken and a DVD is available, made with pictures from our school days. A special table was set up with photos of our classmates who have passed away.

We had ample time to visit with each other. My three friends who became nurses sat down and evaluated my recovery from pneumonia and offered advice and encouragement, along with our visit. My classmate, who's responsible (to blame?) for my career in insurance, talked insurance business with me. Another widowed classmate seeks me out and says I've given her hope. She's heard I've been widowed as she has been and she's met my new husband David. She's inspired. David remembers a friend of his who would love to meet a good lady like this one. Matchmaker - matchmaker.......

We learn of spouses who are ill, of fathers and mothers who have died or are suffering from the affects of aging. Far different from our previous reunions, there is no one untouched by death of a loved one. All of us have faced the mortality of others and thereby faced the fact of our own mortality.

Because of this, we are gentle with each other. We hug a second longer and harder, we hold a hand a minute longer, we look, really look, at each other. There is a great deal of love in this room. We have come because we know there are some in this room we may not see again; for all we know, we might not be here next time around. I am touched by this ability to communicate so deeply with people we've known so long yet don't see for years at a time. We are connected by a shared past and a present that is shared, even though we are apart from each other. There is no measuring of achievement here, no bragging of accomplishments. There is joy for those who've had long marriages, joy for their families, and joy for those who've found renewal after loss. There is sorrow expressed for their loss and much tenderness. From these people who've experienced loss, no one says, "I didn't know what to say". We have learned how to comfort the grieving by experiencing our own grief.

We had an opportunity to introduce ourselves and say a few brief words about our lives. People introduced themselves and then what they said amazed me. We all seem to think our work defines us, categorizes our lives. After all, we spend so much time working and the things we talk about with our neighbors and co-workers is work. So you would think these classmates would tell about their work.

But they don't. They tell us how many years they've been married; they tell us how many children and grandchildren they have, they tell us how many years they have until they retire, they tell of lost spouses and children, they tell of remarriage. They talk of family, not of work; they talk about their real lives, not their work lives.

This then is a legacy we have to give. This then is what we ultimately have to teach our children and their children. Work is important and gives structure and provides the wherewithal we need.

But here's "the rest of the story": Despite wars and rumors of wars, economic woes, loss of jobs, rising housing and fuel costs, global warming, illegal immigration, politics, and taxes, we have survived. Our families have survived, our classmates have survived. Not just survived but thrived. We need to treasure our families and treasure our lifelong friends. Both will bring joy that we ultimately can only feel, but not adequately describe.

And so, my classmates, I salute you! I'm proud to be your classmate and your friend. Your friendship is a treasure to me. Thank you for sharing my walk through life.