SNL -- Saturday Night Live -- John Malkovich and Musical Guest T.I. -- a Sketch by Sketch Review -- 12/6/08

Amy Poehler makes a return visit as Hilary Clinton and Darrell Hammond shows up as Bill. The sketch is Clinton addressing her nomination as Obama's Secretary of State. Unfortunately, none of the humor returns in some really shallow digs at Obama, Palin, and Clinton's own carpetbagging. Horrible opening.

Monologue -- John Malkovich Reads Night Before Christmas -- 5

John Malkovich reads the Night Before Christmas to kids. Gee, how well do you think that will go? You think he'll start saying odd and horrible things? Guess what, you're right. Perhaps it would be funnier if the kids had some humorous reactions, but they all look bored.

Funny line: "When I was a kid, we used to suck on pennies."

Gas Right Adhesive Strips -- 8

The guy who invented Breathe Right adhesive strips decides to do something about late night fart noises. A typical crude SNL commercial, but the Gas Right Strip prop had me laughing. Funny.

Office Birthday Party -- 8

Kristen Wiig is funny as she plays the sexy, dumb, bombshell at an office birthday party. She uses her best baby girl voice to sound sexy, and then counters it with very odd behavior that makes everyone in the office question how sexy she is. The part where she eats a banana is classic, as his her own take on Marilyn Monroe's version of Happy Birthday. I only wish she hadn't lapsed into one of her typical "funny" voices in the end. And the end was unnecessary.

Obama Ad -- Cool -- 7

A jazzy Obama sings a little tune in this nicely shot ad about Barack Obama and his desire to keep it "cool". Well shot, and Fred Armisen does a good Obama for a change.

La Rivista Della Televisione -- 3

I still don't get the foreign talk show parodies that seem to be stock in trade for SNL the past decade for SNL. Bill Hader does a nice John Malkovich, but this is just dreadful. And Bobby Moynihan has GOT to go. His appearance as Vinny's son was dreadful.

Digital Short -- Virgania Horsen's Pony Express -- 2

Digital Shorts have mostly sucked recently, and this one takes a nothing idea, that one woman will offer her services as an alternative to the U.S. Postal Service, and runs with it. It is as bad as it sounds.

The Twins at Christmas Time -- 4

Fred Armisen and John Malkovich muster as many laughs as they can over the premise that two kids REALLY want a calculator for Christmas. But all the humor in it disappeared when they opened the gift and actually got what they wanted. Would have been funnier to have them receive the wrong calculator or none at all.

TI -- 3

Lorne, I see Kanye West is coming up next week. Is it just me or have the musical guests this season been almost uniformly garbage. Would it be possible to find a single rock artist to perform? I know some still exist. This is painful.

Weekend Update -- 6

Amy Poehler is back to Weekend Update. The jokes are pretty funny tonight, and Kenan's Plaxico Burress commentary was pretty funny, as was Fred Armisen's Boy George. An appearance by comedy killer Andy Samburg deducts a point.

Best Lines: "(OJ) reminded the judge that normally when he breaks the law, he gets to go home."

Plaxico Burress: "Guns and sweatpants do not mix."

Judy Blume's Lost Works -- Gertie -- 5

The site of John Malkovich in drag is as scary as you'd imagine. Gertie is a girl who has some freakish body habits that she believes are normal but are absolutely creepy. Sketch was disturbingly amusing.

Jizzed in My Pants -- 7

Wow, how did they get away with this one with the network and the censors? It is like

____ in a box, but without the bleeping. This will be a viral video hit.

TI -- 2

Even worse than the first song.

Jaccuzzi -- 3

Dangerous Liaisons in a hot tub is the premise of this sketch. That's it. Not funny.

Overall -- 5

John Malkovich is wasted here, as most guest stars this season seem to have been. Instead of going for easy jokes at the expense of the guests, perhaps it is time for the writers to start thinking of amusing things for them to do. This episode wasn't the worst of the season, but it wasn't very funny. Is it too late to have another election?