Social Behavior Milestones for 2- to 5-Year-Olds

Is my 5-year-old's social behavior normal? Do other 3-year-olds act this way? Parents of young children ask themselves these questions all the time. I know I did.

Understand that no two kids grow at the same pace or in the same way, and don't be surprised if your child doesn't behave the same as another child of the same age. Milestones, such as the social behavior milestones for 2- to 5-year-olds listed below, are only intended to give parents a general understanding of what to expect as their children grow and mature.

Social Behavior Milestones for 2-Year-Olds:
The second years of kids' lives are called the terrible twos for a reason. Children that are 2 years old are struggling to emerge as individuals.

They start to see themselves as separate from their parents, yet are still not cognitively developed enough to make most decisions for themselves. About half way through the second year, parents will often notice an increase in separation anxiety.

Kids at this age are resistant to change and will be quite vocal about it even though they don't always know how to express their feelings. 2-year-olds begin to recognize what they want and demand to get it often.

Children that are 2 years old are able to follow simple directions.

They may also begin to show an interest in playing make-believe.

Social Behavior Milestones for 3-Year-Olds:
By the time kids reach 3 years old, they usually become less demanding and start to grow socially.

They begin to imitate the actions and words of others. They also start to learn how to express their emotions and affections more effectively.

They learn to take turns when playing with other children their age, even though they still don't share well.

When kids are 3, they still believe everything centers on them. For instance, 3-year-old children may cover their eyes to hide, because they think you can't see them if they can't see you.

For the most part, 3-year-olds begin to separate from their parents more easily.

Children at this age enjoy having a regular routine and balk at major changes to it. Parents may find that 3-year-olds may revert briefly back to babyhood and get more attached to them again if their schedule is disrupted.

They like the same activities, toys, books and foods all the time. When my daughter was 3, we read the same stories every night to the point that she could recite entire children's books to me. I quickly grew tired of the routine, but she did not.

Social Behavior Milestones for 4-Year-Olds:
In their fourth year, children become more independent and are willing to branch out and try new experiences.

They start developing skills to negotiate in conflict, although they still have problems conveying their feelings clearly. Due the impatience and frustration over feeling misunderstood, it is not uncommon for 4-year-olds to have outbursts that include biting, hitting and kicking.

Children at this age enjoy and are capable of playing games with simple rules.

4-year-olds also show a growing interest in role playing and fantasy play. They love to act like dolls and stuffed animals can talk, eat, and interact the way they do. Parents of 4-year-olds may also notice them pretending to play with invisible objects.

Kids at the age of 4 have a developing imagination that often confuses them, causing them to have difficulty determining between real and imagined. They often tell outrageous stories. When my younger daughter was a 4-year-old, she loved animals so much that she often pretended we had a farm with hundreds of animals. She knew the names of all the animals, what they looked like, what they ate and how often they ate. She talked about her imaginary farm as though it were real and became adamant when anyone told her otherwise. Her imagination was so great she had her teacher questioning if it were true.

Social Behavior Milestones for 5-Year-Olds:
By the time kids reach the age of 5, they are even more independent and social. Not only do they now interact better with other kids, they also want to please friends and be more like them.

Playing games is attractive to 5-year-olds, but so is winning. They may get very upset if they lose or cheat to win.
5-year-olds may take things that don't belong to them simply because they want them. They also might lie to avoid being disciplined.

Children who are 5 are now conscious of gender differences and may show a preference for one parent or gender over another.

They are more equipped to learn and follow rules. Kids at this age often fluctuate between being cooperative and being demanding.

Imagination still plays an important part for 5-year-olds, but they understand and are able to differentiate between fantasy and real life.

Sources:

"Developmental Milestones," Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC).
"Is Your Baby on Track?",WebMD.
"Developmental Milestons: A Guide for Parents," National Network for Child Care.
"Ages & Stages," Healthy Children.

Other parenting articles by this author:

How to Help Your Toddler Get a Restful Sleep
Five Tips to Get Kids to Eat Healthy Foods
When Your Toddler Refuses to Go to Bed