Social Networking for Dinosaurs

I came out of my cave and discovered social networking when my teenage daughter joined MySpace and Facebook. I wanted to know why it was so fascinating to her. From a cursory search I realized that MySpace was not suitable for my advanced years. Instead, I checked out Facebook and CafeMom.

It is probably not fair to make comparisons between Facebook and CafeMom because people join these communities for somewhat different purposes. When it comes to connecting with old friends and family, I pick Facebook. On Facebook I quickly located cousins my age, their children, one friend who moved away, and two local friends. I also exchange notes with my daughter who lives with me 100 per cent of the time.

On CafeMom I have no friends. There are many groups though which are easy to join. I did a search for an interesting book club on both sites. CafeMom won this one for being most accessible. The book club members I found on Facebook knew each other in real life and were meeting off-line.

I found the main difference between groups on Facebook and CafeMom is that most of the groups on CafeMom have guidelines. New members are warned to follow them or get dropped. Since the rules are based on basic courtesy, this dinosaur has no problem with it. In both places I get notifications of new postings in my groups.

Facebook describes itself as "a social utility that connects you with the people around you." And it does everything it claims. I usually decide to get onto Facebook if when I check my email there is a notification for me. For example, I took a quiz yesterday and made a comment on my cousin's wall about it. As the self-proclaimed Facebook addict that he is, my cousin got right back to me.

Of course, I got right back to him. Once on Facebook, I checked out my notifications and what my friends are doing. Then I looked for a friend who just had a baby. Maybe she is on Facebook.

I surf on CafeMom a little differently. I go to my profile page and check out my Head of the Class widget first. After I correctly answer my question of the day or spaz, I check the posts in my groups. Most do not interest me because I have been there and do not need to be there again. I did investigate the post about the Parisian who delivered triplets at age 59. I am also in agreement with the majority of posts about that.

As "a place for moms and moms-to-be to connect to one another" CafeMom fulfills its description. But I will not be looking for my newly-a-mom friend on CafeMom because no one uses a real or full name. This gives moms the freedom to blurt about stuff they might not admit except to the closest friend.

Mostly I find that if I want to waste time and amuse myself, both CafeMom and Facebook are great for that. I have low expectations for making new friends on either. Yet I have fun anyway. CafeMom is the new Dear Abby; Facebook lets me read and write posts in Latin with people all around the world. If I can get my dinosaur friends to give up on email and join me, life on the internet will be even better.