(Some) Reasons to Not Have Kids

I'll never forget this question. It was asked to me by my gynecologist when I went in to inquire about possible methods of contraception.

"Sure, I said. "Who doesn't like puppies? But I must admit I like kittens better."

Then he told me the reason for his query.

"I love puppies," he said. "They're a lot like babies. They need a lot of attention. But a cat is independent, even as a kitten. They more or less can take care of themselves."

He told me he asked this question to all his patients who were not interested in having kids, and that on average, those who answered yes to liking puppies tended to lean more towards wanting kids than not wanting.

This is not to say I dislike puppies, I just like kittens better. But I don't like babies, and I certainly don't ever want to have one.

People have their reasons for not wanting kids. Some just want to have careers, others (like me) have a disdain for humanity. Just kidding (sort of).

So reasons I don't want kids?

1) My time is too important to me.

I'm a writer and I appreciate those who are independent. Ultimately I know myself enough to know that I'd end up resenting the child for taking my creative time away from me. If I knew the kid I was going to have would end up being another Picasso or Newton or Einstein, I could consider the sacrifice worth it. But just to bring another accountant or plumber into the world? No thanks. My creativity is more important. That's just my honesty speaking.

Since I am able to create, I don't feel the need to procreate. My legacy will last in my creative work, not in some genetic bloodline. Frankly, I don't care about passing on my genes. I realize that makes me unusual, since most people seek to reproduce. I don't.

2) I'm not going to do something simply because it's expected of me.

"So when are you gonna have kids?" People would ask. I loathe conformity, and I think many couples have kids because it's "the thing married couples are supposed to do." They allow society to pressure them. I remember when this annoying co-worker called me selfish because I didn't want to have kids. Yeah, and? At least I'm honest about it. Wasn't it Ayn Rand who lauded "The Virtue of Selfishness?"

3) I don't want to take on that financial/emotional responsibility.

Once you have a kid, you can't take it back. It's not like a bad marriage you can break away from. I know what I can and cannot handle, and others should too as well.

4) Personal reasons that I don't wish to broadcast.

Having a child is a personal choice, and some of the factors going into that choice I choose to remain personal.

If nothing I've said resonates with you, then you're probably someone who wants kids and who would make a good parent. After all, I realize there is nothing wrong with puppies; I do like them, in fact. I like them so much that I own five cats.