Some Statements Those May Tell You to Smile a Little

a) Teacher : Name one animal found in Sea environment.
Student : Whale.
Teacher : Splendid. Name another animal found in Sea.
Student : another Whale, sir.

b) History Teacher : Tell me briefly what happened in our country 10 years ago.
A student : Now it is year 2007 sir. So, it was 1997 ten years ago.

c) Cruel father : How will you wish your mother on her birthday ?
Son : Many many happy returns of this day.
Cruel father : and, on my birthday ?
Son : Many many unhappy returns of this day.

d) Customer : How can I use this umbrella for a long time ?
Umbrella seller : if you don't use this umbrella in summer and rainy seasons.

e) One boy : I saw two men yesterday on the street, one was talking so much but another was telling nothing. I didn't understand why.
another boy : It is very simple. The first one is bachelor, but other is married.

f) Teacher : The antonym of rise is fall. Now tell me the antonym of sunrise.
Student : Sunfall !

g) Interviewer : Where does satisfaction come from ?
Candidate : From a factory.
Interviewer : Which factory ?
Candidate : from satis-factory.

h) Teacher : if God offers you to take any one between intelligence and wealth, what will you choose ?
Student : certainly, wealth sir.
Teacher : you are so greedy, I will ask God to give me intelligence.
Student : naturally sir. Everybody wants what he has less.

i) Teacher : When was Rome built ?
Student : In a night sir !
Teacher : Who gave you this wrong information.
Student : You sir ! Because you told me that 'Rome was not built in a day.'

j) Interviewer : My father is now 60 years old. Can you tell me my age ?
Candidate : But how can I tell your age sir !
Interviewer : don't ask me the answer. Tell the answer or get lost.
Candidate : yes sir. Now I can. Your present age is 40.
Interviewer : Very good, How could you say this correct information ?
Candidate : It is so simple sir. My old boss was 20 years old, and he was a half mad. But you are full, so you are 40.

k) Teacher : Harry, wake up. How can you sleep in my class ?
Student : I can, sir, If you keep your voice down.

l) Husband : if I died, you will marry Tony. Give me promise.
Wife : but he is our enemy !
Husband : I know it well . I want to give him a strong punishment.