Some Things Just Aren't Worth the Battle

I am the mother of a very smart, very stubborn four year old girl. She is sassy as can be, yet at times sweet as can be. Here within the last year or so she has become so much more independent then she has previously been. She has started deciding what she wants to wear to school, etc. At first I had a real tough time with this. I'm not an overly anal parent whose child has to match all the time, but I do like her to look somewhat coordinated. Well, I finally realized that if I wanted her to continue to become independent and to keep picking out her own clothing I'd have to let go of some of my control issues as far as that all goes. There are times where I can persuade her to choose between two things so she feels as if she's still picking out her own clothing but I know they'll somewhat match.

Last night was a gym night and I was running around trying to get the kids and myself ready and out to the door to hit the gym. My daughter comes into my room and has her Cinderella costume from halloween that she wants to put on. It really is a beautiful dress and she does just want to be the princess that she is! At first I told her no she wasn't wearing it to the gym, but then decided it wasn't going to hurt anything and it would save me a fight with a four year old. So as I proceeded to get myself ready she went ahead and put her dress on. Then she had to find the little shoes to wear with the dress and get her wand, purse, necklace and tiara. Once she was pretty much put together the way she saw fit she needed mom to do her hair. Of course, we can't wear a Cinderella dress and not have our hair done! My only concern was that she was going to be cold. I was able to talk her into putting a t-shirt underneath the dress and also wearing a sweater to the gym. The rest of it was her idea and she was happy as could be. I realized that it didn't hurt a thing. She was enjoying herself and really what was it going to hurt for her to dress up as a princess for the gym...nothing! It was a whole lot easier then arguing with her on what she needed to put on.

So this morning we're getting ready for school and I'm in the bathroom putting my make-up on. She comes in the bathroom and stands on the toilet and she wants to put on make-up too. My initial reaction was no, but once again realized it wasn't worth the fight that would follow if I said no. The only thing she really wanted was some powder on her face so she could feel like she was putting on make-up just like mommy. It was much easier to give her the powder and the brush and let her do her thing. Once she was all ready and we were about to head to school she decided she needed to wear a tiara. I didn't think she should since all the other girls wouldn't have one on in her class, but she really wanted to. I did however put my foot down when she tried to put on a princess dress over her clothes. We compromised and it's in her book bag just in case!

I could go on and on with examples of me picking my battles with my daughter. I'm sure some people probably think I'm a pushover and not very strict and they are very wrong. I'm strict when it matters. However, dressing up as a princess and being a happy, carefree four year old girl is perfectly fine in my eyes. There are battles worth fighting, but most of them when they are this age just simply aren't worth it!