SOME THINGS WERE JUST MEANT to BE KEPT SECRET

As a child I spent many afternoons engrossed in my favorite television shows. One of my biggest favorites was The Rifleman starring Chuck Connors as Lucas McCane. Chuck/Lucas was pretty cool. He didn't take any guff from anyone. If anybody gave him a hard time he'd just spin that fancy custom made 30-30 Winchester with the oversized trigger guard around and calmly blow the offending party to kingdom come. Yeah, you didn't mess with Chuck 'er Lucas.

Nowadays you might say that ole Chuck/Lucas had an anger management problem. But that's okay. I kinda liked the way he handled things back then. Maybe if we all were allowed to blow people away with our custom made 30-30's there'd be less people around trying to annoy us. Who knows? I know Chuck/Lucas never had a shortage of people around who pissed him off. I used to just love that show. I even had a toy rifle just like Chuck/Lucas's that I carried around with me everywhere I went. Lord knows how many times I fantasized about spinning my rifle around just like Chuck/Lucas and shooting that bully down the street right between the eyes. You get the picture.

Ole Chuck/Lucas was pretty hot tempered all right but he had his son Mark, (Played by Johnny Crawford), to keep him in check. You see right when Chuck/Lucas was about ready to blow his top you'd always hear Mark yell, "NO PA NO!", and at least till close to the end of the episode cooler heads would prevail. This would only forestall the inevitable though because eventually Chuck/Lucas would get around to shooting the offending party. I remember thinking that if he'd just shot that wimp Mark he wouldn't have had to waste so much time before getting down to the real action.

But that's not what this story is about. No, the sad fact is somehow my wife found a gay porno film starring none other than.....You guessed it...our boy Chuckles. Now, just the thought of Chuck/Lucas McCane/Mark's Dad being involved in a gay porno film is bad enough but folks, (and I say this in a choked up voice), Chucky was going for the gusto. In other words people he was slammin' it home and loving every minute of it.

I watched this sad display for awhile with teary eyes and all I could think of was to yell "NO PA NO!!!".