Songs that Can Make a Grown Man Cry

It's an unwritten truth that guys are supposed to suck it up and not show emotion, in public at least. When I say emotion, I mean crying. Apparently, anger and boisterous happiness are fair game if you are male. But shed a tear in front of your gender equals and you could be finished forever socially and have your membership revoked in the men's club. I'm not talking about the Hair Club for Men, of which I'm not a client or those so called "gentlemen's clubs" (like adding the word gentlemen really fools anyone) which I am also not a client. I am talking about ridicule and ostracism from the Brotherhood of Dude.

I'm sure there are worse fates than losing your membership to a club that has the pull my finger trick as the secret handshake (I think I may have said too much). Until now, the only exceptions to the no cry rule, for my generation anyway, were during the first viewing of Brian's Song or Old Yeller, and there is a possible amendment to that rule for later generations, and that would be the first viewing of E.T. the Extra - Terrestrial. To my knowledge, these are the only free passes.

Now ladies, do you understand why guys don't like to go to chick movies? It's not because they hate Meg Ryan or Julia Roberts, although some of it may be due to their disdain for Hugh Grant, although I can't prove that. It's because guys don't want to be put into a public situation where they may start weeping uncontrollably because Meg or Julia found Mr. Right, who just happened to be their best friend all along.

Well guys, just when you thought it was safe as long as you avoided the chick movies and films about dying athletes, rabid dogs, and departing aliens, for crying out loud, you couldn't be further from the truth. Now you have to worry about music tugging at your emotions too. There are many popular songs that can make a grown man cry, in a good way of course, as long as they don't come on the radio while you are driving with your bros.

There is no easy way to pinpoint one of these songs ahead of time. It's not like Meg Ryan or Julia Roberts will be the deejay introducing these tunes. These songs can elicit emotion with a somber gut wrenching, heart tugging melody (The Last Resort, After the Gold Rush), universal, unavoidable truths like love, lost or found (Can't You See, Hard Woman, All I Want is You) or death, figurative or literal (Cold Cold Ground, Keep Me In your Heart), or the frightening responsibilities of parenthood (Fool to Cry, The Tide is Turning) or unrealized dreams (The Ring, Highway 17). It could even be a mixture of any of these components that can make you Old Yell, and Brian Sing like a girl if you're not careful.

Guys, now that we are aware that there are so many emotion inducing songs out there, it's probably time we have one of our emergency meetings (secret handshake required prior to admittance) and discuss some additional amendments to our club charter.

In preparation for the meeting, everyone should become acquainted with the following songs that have been alleged to make grown men cry.*

It is suggested that you do this privately and individually, and not with your bros, of course.

The Last Resort - The Eagles

Fool to Cry - The Rolling Stones

All I Want is You - U2

Bell Bottom Blues - Derek and the Dominos

Blue Moon Revisited (Song for Elvis) - Cowboy Junkies

Can't You See - The Marshall Tucker Band

After the Gold Rush - Neil Young

Cold Cold Ground - Tom Waits

Cold Hard Winter - The Stone Coyotes

Cool Change - Little River Band

For Blue Skies - Strays Don't Sleep

Hard Woman - Mick Jagger

Goodnight Elisabeth - The Counting Crows

Jealous Guy - John Lennon

Highway 17 - Rodney Crowell

I Cover the Waterfront - John Lee Hooker and Van Morrison

I'm Going Home - Rocky Horror Picture Show

Keep Me in Your Heart - Warren Zevon

Let It Be - The Beatles

Never is a Moment - Jimmy LaFave

Racing in the Street - Bruce Springsteen

The Ring - Bob Seger

Mull of Kintyre - Paul McCartney and Wings

Sweetest Decline - Beth Orton

The Tide is Turning - Roger Waters

Wild Horses - The Rolling Stones

Why - Annie Lennox

*These songs are for educational and reference purposes only and are performed and written by the credited artists.


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