Spiders in the Bathtub

What I love about spiders (and I love many things) is that they are attentive. When you near a spider and realize its there, it sits very still and quiet. It doesn't run away when you shoo it, although it is only one's goodwill and not it's "I blend in with beige walls you can't see me" mentality that saves this eight legged creature from being smooshed.

A spider will sit through an entire rendition of the alphabet song, Walt Whitman's Leaves of Grass, or a badly played version of Stairway to Heaven. In essence, spiders are the ultimate captive audience for the creative narcissistic type.

I write. I write poetry. I write songs. I write screenplays. I tell stories. I draw (albeit not very good). I have an extreme creative drive. However I know not every one wants to sit through impromptu creations of on the spot poetry, or lyric writing in the bathtub. Thus when I see a spider perched quietly on the wall, I do not get scared, nor assume anthropomorphically that its a peeping tom. I gleefully engage my patient audience member in all sorts of performances (rated pg or below).

When my daughters were about 2 and 4, we noticed that spiders had a penchance for our bathroom. Actually spiders had a penchance for the whole house, which was empty for a while before we moved in. But these spiders didn't seem quite as hardy as the big furry ones dominating the rest of the house.

Nay, somehow they were slender and delicate looking, almost squeamish and civilized. Its as if they figured out that the bathroom was the safest room in the house, away from ants on the battle lines, bugs, spider thugs, brooms, and all manner of web destruction.

My daughters were scared at first. But I taught them to take advantage of the type of audience that you may never be able to corner again.

(Apparently they have forgotten...but a mommy never forgets moments in which her brood serenade arachnids during bath time)

Yes, it is true that the spiders probably only sit there so still because they are afraid of being eaten. But we're not afraid of them--nor will we eat them. We're very appreciative of them--so much so that the worst thing about spiders in the bathtub is when one slips to its doom to the wet waters below.