Sports Briefs: For Pete's Sake!

Joe: Pete Carroll's NFL claim to fame, if he has one, is that he was an average defensive coordinator for 12 years with a variety of average NFL teams. As a head coach, he has, barely, a winning record (33-31) due mainly to the fact that he took over a New England Super Bowl team before driving them in his final season to a record of 8-8, all in just three years. Why is this time going to be any different?

Chris: New York and Boston may have been able to offer Dunkin' Donuts, but Seattle has Top Pot Doughnuts. Seattle rookie wide receiver Golden Tate considered their maple bars flavorsome enough to pilfer. This could be a theory as to why Carroll left the sunshine and legacy of USC to govern the Seahawks and share an umbrella with Eeyore.

Brad: I think USC's troubles were a major part of Carroll's departure. The character move would have been to stay with his team, but Carroll chose the easy and money way out. Ralphie is still on vacation, so he has missed all the USC memos recently.

Joe: Carroll broke the rules, allowed them to be broken by others and either knew, or looked the other way, as everything was happening. In the world of college football, the school, the players and their reputations get punished for breaking the rules. The coach just slithers away to another coaching job.

Chris: Professors Neuheisel, Barnett and Calipari offer courses on this subject at institutions of higher learning.

Brad: Carroll deserves a major blame for USC's recent dysfunctions. He was the head coach and the undisputed leader of the team, he should have known if something illegal was going on. Either he knew and turned his back to it all, or he was naïve enough to not pay attention. Either way it's his fault.

Chris: When the NCAA says they are going to strip Reggie Bush of his Heisman Trophy, will they literally be visiting his house, trying to repossess the award? He could possibly thwart them (I just said "thwart") by not answering the door. And I would like to officially start the campaign of awarding Vince Young the 2005 repossessed Heisman.

Brad: No matter what Chris says, he still wouldn't mind being in Reggie Bush's position. And yet, Chris still would have found a way to mess it up more.

Chris: It is a shame Matt Leinart could not find employment under Carroll once more. This is a sign that the Seattle quarterback depth chart is well-proportioned, though I suppose Carroll could still funnel Leinart Green Stamps.

Brad: In five-six years I think Carroll will begin to have some success in the NFL, but seeing as how he is coaching the Seattle Seahawks, there will be no immediate success in his future. Carroll will be able to lure some big names away just because of his mystique, but it will take some time.

Joe: Carroll once said that the NCAA investigation had been ongoing for five years and that he was ". . . just numb to it." Hey, Pete--numb but not dumb, because you got out of town just before the hammer fell and just in time to let the school and current regime take the heat.

Brad: Joe is so old he already forgot what USC did wrong.