Staying a Stay at Home Mom

When a woman has a baby, many times they decide to quit their job if they already had one, or not seek a job, in order to stay at home and nurture and raise their child. In the beginning, the newness of the baby itself is enough to keep the mother busy and content, but as time goes on, the mother may be faced with conflicting emotions that makes it difficult to stay firm in her resolve to stay home with her child, and often, children. Usually, there are two main issues that the mother has trouble dealing with, financial pressure, and boredom.

When money gets tight, the first impulse is to think that the mother should get a job to help ease the stress. But there are other ways of relieving financial troubles without getting a job. There are so many ways to be frugal, and make the money that is already there stretch, so the mother can continue to stay home and raise her family herself.

Typing in frugal living on the internet brings up so many sites with very good ideas. One of the best books to get to help with frugal ideas is "The Tightwad Gazette" by Amy Dacyczyn. This book is entertaining as well as educational. It will teach you how to save money on groceries, clothes, gift giving, your car, your house, and many, many other avenues. It will teach you how to make do it yourself mixes for your pantry and how to make simple presents and costumes. You can find this book at the library, even better is to buy it and have it on hand all the time to flip through and get new ideas.

Learning to cook from scratch, rather than buying processed food in boxes, or frozen TV dinner type meals, will save you money both in groceries and doctor bills.

As much as some of us dislike the idea, everything we wear doesn't have to be new. Garage sales are a good place to buy clothes, especially for a growing toddler. Ebay is fun to search, and especially after Easter, you can buy really nice things for family at good prices. You can even buy a sewing machine and learn to sew. Many pattern companies sell the 'easy to sew' type patterns now for a new learner. And most of the older ladies in your family would be glad to give you hints.

Pick up a new hobby, like crocheting, knitting or cross stitch and make gifts, rather than buying the same things in the specialty stores. Many craft stores have classes, and you can also buy books to teach yourself.

Open your windows in the spring and summer, rather than running the heat and air year round. The added benefits of fresh air, listening to the birds sing, and hearing your children playing will lift your spirits, and make your day go better!

Sometimes, even harder than financial pressures on a stay at home mother is the boredom that will creep up on her. The world seems to have somehow lost the art of homemaking. What a woman does in her home is just not deemed as important, and indeed, unless a woman really throws herself into her homemaking and parenting, it sometimes isn't.

But a stay at home mom does not have to be the stereotype of watching TV all day, lying around reading magazines, not getting dressed, a hectic, harassed looking person who doesn't accomplish anything. Herein lays the opportunity of making your homemaking an art.

Have a vision for raising your children, rather than just letting each day happen. Determine what kind of person you would like them to be, and spend time planning what you need to do to make that happen. Get rid of the 'fluff' stuff in their lives that does not build character, and instead, make the books they read, the games they play and the TV and movies they watch all be quality, morally upright and an influence that will make them better people. Spend much time at the library, but don't let them just pick up anything, guide them to better reading material, and most importantly, KNOW what they read. Read it first if you need too, or draw back on your own childhood to know good, classic books that are safe for their little minds. A good rule of thumb is that many books written before 1960 are usually safe and more morally sound for children. Not everything, so still be cautious, but that can be a helpful guide.

Make your home a peaceful, comforting place to be. Light candles. Let your children gather flowers everyday to decorate. Oftentimes, wild flowers from the curb are just as nice as well tended roses. Get a large piece of material from the $1 table at your local Walmart, and sew or glue lace edgings to make tablecloths for your kitchen. Wash your windows, and open your curtains and let the sunshine come in!! That alone can do much to raise your spirits. And it's interesting to watch what is going on in your little world around you.

Learn a craft. Many times this can also be a home business for you, but don't let any home business take away from your main job of raising your children and keeping your home itself. Learning to make soap is an easy, fun thing to do, and is really good for presents. Crocheting, knitting, and sewing, as was mentioned above, is another thing to do that gives a nice sense of self worth, and can also be given away or sold. Learn to grow and arrange flowers, or dry them to make arrangements and unusual decorations on gifts and note cards.

And learn to keep your little world clean. Nothing can dampen your spirits more than to live in a dusty, cluttered, ill managed home. Flylady on the internet is a wonderful teaching source to help you get your housework under control. Put this site on digest form, and you won't be overwhelmed with all the emails she sends.

One of the best ways to get your housework under control is to declutter. Be ruthless. Children do not need so many toys. Most of us do not need so many clothes. That junk drawer holds things you most likely will never touch again. Get three boxes, one marked store, one marked keep, and one marked give away, and starting going through all your closets and drawers and toy boxes. A clean decluttered house will do wonders for your morale!

In the end, anything you do, whether it is staying at home or working outside the home, needs your best efforts in order to fulfill any needs you have and be worth your time. Make your homemaking and child raising your top priority. Research it, plan it, pray about it, and give it your very best. Your house will shine, and your children will rise up to call you blessed!