Stopping the Wedding Just Before You Walk Down the Aisle

I have a friend that knew just before she was to walk down the aisle, that she didn't want to marry her man. Unfortunately, she was so worried about the wedding, the guests, and what would people think, she went through with it anyway. A few years down the road she ended up divorced. Now you maybe thinking that''s stupid, she just should have called the wedding off? Well guess what? This happens more than you can imagine. Remember some of these wedding are planned for years. People are coming from all over the country, and sometimes overseas as well. Thousands of dollars have been spent. Mom and Dad are anticipating a perfect wedding day. To top all that off, you have the man you love waiting at the alter for you, that you really don;t want to hurt. So, what part of this says it's easy to call of a wedding off at the last minute?

I seriously believe in gut feelings. My mentor told me, as I tell my fledglings, that if you have a strong feeling about something you are probably right. Thousands of years ago gut instinct was an important factor in one's survival. However over the many years this instinct has become extinguished, and people try and rely on intellect alone. This may not be a good idea. Gut instinct tells us a lot about what's safe, impending danger, and what may or may not not make us happy in the long run. Yes, I truly believe that if a woman has a gut feeling that something isn't right, the wedding needs to wait, even if it's just before she walks down the aisle.

Sometimes a woman can be so wrapped up in the excitement of an engagement, and the planning of a wedding she fails to see signs in her relationship that say, maybe I shouldn't be going through with this. When someone is wrapped up in total chaos, and yes you can believe me that weddings are pure chaos, they don't stop to think. Even if they have a twinge, there are plenty of people around to assure them they are just nervous and there is nothing to worry about. But is this really true? There may be plenty to worry about as far as the relationship is concerned, but with everything going on it's just easier for the bride to put it out of her mind.

So, there the bride after all the torture planning a wedding can bring, waiting to walk down the aisle. She starts to get this feeling that this is not what she wants to do, something is wrong, and she not even be sure she loves this man enough to marry him. So, what;s a girl to do? The first thing the bride can do is ask for a break. Let people know you need a few minutes. Explain it's been an overwhelming day and you need some time to calm down. This way you are not stopping the wedding short at that moment. Go to the bride's room, they usually have a room at the church for the brides to dress in, and take some time to yourself. No one else should be in the room. There's too much of a chance they will be rushing you, and convincing you're just nervous. Maybe you are just nervous, but this is what those precious moments are about, to figure out what it is your feeling. Don't worry the guests can wait. If they don';t want to wait, they know where the exit door is.

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If at this point you have given yourself some down time and still feel very apprehensive about walking down the aisle, then you may need to postpone the wedding, I use the word postpone, because you probably aren't ready at this point to actually say that your never marrying this man. The truth is you're probably not sure about any of it, or you wouldn't be feeling this way. Get your maid of honor to get your fiancee so you can personally let him know what you decided. Don't let someone announce to the guests as well as him, guess what she's not coming. After you speak to your fiancee, that is the time for someone to make the announcement to the guests. It''s up to you whether it is someone else, or you and your fiancee as a couple do it. Don't worry, if he truly loves you, he won't want you to do anything you don't feel right about.

After the wedding is postponed, you will need to take the time to figure out why you felt the way you did about getting married. That's okay take your time. No one should ever say wedding vows, unless they whole heartedly mean them. In the end you will be glad you did this. Will you marry this man that you jilted at the alter so to speak? You may very well, or maybe never. The point is, if you have a bad feeling, a gut instinct, that something isn't right, you do have every right to say "I Don't", Instead if "I Do", even if it' s just before you walk down that aisle!

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