Substitute Teaching is a Garbage Job

I've learned a lot from being a substitute teacher. I've learned how non adults think, how they react to certain things and how I'd rather be homeless than have this profession as a career choice. It was good money for the days that I was working, which was about two to three days a week. However, it took them about one to two months to pay me. With a pay schedule that is so spurious, it almost feels like volunteer work. The pay periods aren't the main problem, it's the schools and the non adults that make it a nightmare. Here are a couple of things that I've learned in my endeavor.

Children don't understand sarcasm. If you are sarcastic with them, they'll take you seriously and it could get you in trouble. One example was when some children wanted to have free time. They had to finish their accelerated reading requirements before they could do anything else. Some of the children exclaimed that they were already finished, so I responded with "Bull, I don't believe you." Consequently, during lunch, four girls went to the principal and told on me that I was a tyrant, cussed, and played favorites. I was pulled from my assignment without them hearing my side of the story. This brings me to my next point.

Substitutes have less credibility than the students. It doesn't matter if they're in kindergarten, severely emotionally disturbed, high school, deaf, blind etc. When a substitute gets a complaint, they get thrown out like trash and demonized. "Oh poor shmoopsies, he won't hurt you again, you're all little angels that never do anything wrong." This is a conversation I overhead in my head as I was being suspended. Then they complain that it's so hard to find substitute teachers. Some districts don't even require a degree because of the shortage. I have a solution.

My time substituting has taught me that the school system needs spanking again. The children love to misbehave and get attention from their peers. They don't like working and they have no discipline at home. We are in a generation where discipline is the devil and self gratification is the deity to which everyone worships. This has made the worst learning environment. Why? Simply because to learn and sit in a classroom for six hours a day takes discipline! The time outs and pulling cards don't work for the really bad kids. This type of punishment only works if they don't like to sit alone and do nothing. Legalize spanking again and escalate it to scourging if need be.

Lastly, what I learned about substituting is that if you care too much about getting the older children and teens to work, you'll have a nervous breakdown. If you are substituting high school, then forget about it. You have no control over them. The only thing that you can do is threaten them with referrals. You may think that you would just refer all of them to the office if they misbehave. That is a two edged sword. If you refer too many teens, then the school thinks that you can't do your job. I won't lie and say you'll get banned from the school. They're too desperate to do that. You're only option is to get some of them to work and then make up some game to play with them until the bell rings. Besides, they only give you like five referral slips per day.

Stay away from substituting for any grades higher than 3rd grade. You may actually enjoy substituting. Be firm and use all the discipline techniques for any slightly wrong thing that they do. That way things won't get out of hand. Don't substitute the same class for more than two days in a row, unless you're a professional.