Sue Thomas, F.B.Eye Fan Fiction: "Blarney" - Part 1

"Blarney" is published in three parts:
Part 1 - You are here.
Part 2
Part 3 - Conclusion.

*** What was I thinking? Musings on my foray into fan fiction. Sue Thomas, F.B.Eye was created by Dave Alan Johnson and Gary R. Johnson. ***

"Blarney," by B.A. Rogers

SCENE 1 - In the bullpen.

It's morning and Sue and Levi are the first ones at work. They are alone in the bullpen. Levi looks sheepish and mopey, following Sue with his eyes. Sue sits down at her desk and pets him to comfort him.

Sue: Well, Levi, we're the first ones here this morning, so we can talk about it and get things all straightened out.

Levi turns his head and whines a little, as if he's sad.

Sue: No, you didn't do anything wrong. You did everything right. You didn't leave me. You were protecting me by chasing that big goose away. But it's just that I do need you to listen to me, at all times. We need to work together. (Sue points at her eyes.) When you go off, you can't go so far that I can't see you. Okay, you have to be able to see me and me you.

Levi paws Sue's lap and looks up at her lovingly.

Sue: You know what?

As Sue talks, she slips out of her chair and sits on the floor, with her legs stretched out in front of her, crossed at the ankles, and resting her back against her desk. Levi puts his head in her lap and revels in her words.

Sue: I have something to tell you.

As Sue says this, Jack walks in to the bullpen, ready to start the work day. He quickly sees Sue sitting on the floor with Levi's head in her lap. He stops and backs off a little, then walks back to the entranceway. But he can't help but hear what Sue is saying to Levi. Sue does not notice Jack.

Sue: (to Levi) I don't think I tell you enough how much I love you and how much I appreciate you. How could I? Words can't do it justice. But I do love you. And I know that you love me. And, even if we don't always say it, I know that we'll always be there for each other. Always. In fact, we're going to grow old together --- how great is that!

Jack is taken aback a little by how Sue's words affect him as he listens, almost as if she is speaking to him. Just as he is briefly lost in his thoughts, Garrett walks up to the entrance to the bullpen.

Garrett: Jack. (after he has Jack's attention) I need to speak to you and . . . (leaning over a little, puzzling at seeing Sue sitting on the floor with Levi) Sue, in my office. (Again looking at Sue and Levi) Whenever . . . Sue is ready.

Jack nods as Garrett leaves.

Cut to Garrett's office.

Garrett is seated behind his desk and Jack and Sue are seated in front of it. Jack and Sue are a little apprehensive, unsure of why they've been summoned this time.

Garrett: (shaking his head) How come every time I have you both in my office at the same time I feel like the team is about to have a near-death experience?

Jack and Sue look at each other sideways, then back at Garrett with increased apprehension.

Garrett: Jack, about that little port security cruise with the Coast Guard you applied for---

Jack: ---Wait a minute. That was a year ago. No, that was way over a year ago. And that assignment was already filled by the time I got my paperwork in.

Garrett: Well, the assignment is unfilled now. And they're scrambling. They went back through their file of previous applicants and, who knew, they settled on Special Agent Jack Hudson.

Jack: A lot has changed since then. I mean . . . with the team. The cases we're involved with. The thing is, I'm not interested --- not as interested in port security, as I was when I applied.

Jack glances briefly at Sue, then back to Garrett.

Jack: It was a voluntary assignment.

Garrett: Don't make me laugh. . . . At this point, if they need you, and apparently they do, then you're the man. I'll do everything in my power to make it a temporary assignment while they go through the full selection process. But . . . it is what it is.

Jack: How long is this . . . cruise?

Garrett: For you --- if you go --- I'd say at least eight weeks.

Sue: (forgetting herself) Eight weeks? Jack was just gone six weeks already.

Garrett looks at Sue a little strangely. Sue quickly becomes a little embarrassed that she spoke out of turn. Garrett moves on and resumes talking to Jack.

Garrett: (reviewing the paperwork) And the requested reporting date is --- wouldn't you know, it says "A-S-A-P." As soon as possible. (to Jack) Again, I'm trying everything I know how to do to keep you here and, if you go, I'm trying to get you back as soon as possible. But you ---

Jack: ---know how these things go.

Garrett nods.

Garrett: Now, Sue.

Sue: I'm not really the Coast Guard type. I don't enjoy big waves. At all.

Garrett: Don't worry. This involves going over the sea, not on it.

Sue takes a deep breath.

Garrett: The Mastrig Fellowship. Eight weeks in Helsinki.

Sue: Eight weeks?

Jack: (forgetting himself) Helsinki?

Garrett looks at Jack strangely. Jack is a little embarrassed at speaking out of turn.

Garrett: (to Sue) Eight big ones. And the even bigger problem for me is that your eight weeks (indicating Sue) are consecutive with his eight weeks (indicating Jack). Which leaves the team without one or both of you for a possible total of four months.

Jack: That's a long time for us to be away from . . . the team.

Garrett: I can't spare either of you for that long. Simple as that. Not for this.

Sue: I didn't apply for the Mastrig fellowship. I didn't apply for any fellowships.

Garrett: But the person who did apply, and who was selected, now has a family emergency and the powers that be are looking to line up an alternate, just in case. Who knew? Right after shining their favor upon Jack Hudson, the next person Personnel put up in lights was our own Sue Thomas.

Sue: It's a great honor, I'm sure, to even be considered for the fellowship. But--

Garrett: --- But do you have a choice?

Sue: Yes.

Garrett: Of course you have a choice. Just like Jack, at this point, has a choice about going on Temporary Duty with the Coast Guard. "Choice" in a FBI-manner of speaking.

Sue slumps and Jack shakes his head a little.

Garrett: Now here's how it concerns both of you at the same time. Trotter. You've been hunting him for four months now and ---

Jack: --- We're close.

Garrett: Yes, you are. But "close" counts in horseshoes, not with the Personnel Department.

Sue: But we're really close.

Jack: This week, even, we're expecting a breakthrough.

Sue: Showtime.

Garrett: Showtime.

Garrett takes a deep breath.

Garrett: Okay. We have two goals here. One, in case one or both of you are leaving for an extended period of time, you've got to spend every waking minute this week working together to tie up all the loose ends --- any and all loose ends --- you possibly can. Professional, personal, whatever. Morning, noon and night. Breakfast, lunch and dinner. You have to get that case as far along, and as nailed down, as possible, in the event one or both of you have to be replaced.

Jack and Sue nod.

Garrett: Secondly. I know you're close to hemming in Trotter.

Jack: We're very close.

Garrett: You said that. But you're not close on paper. On paper, the case looks as though it's stalled out. And, frankly, I haven't been able to convince Personnel otherwise. But the fact is, if we get lucky this week --- if, say, everything you've been working so hard to put in place works, and we actually find Trotter, maybe even bring him in --- then it's beyond dispute that you two need to be here to take the case forward. That's what it's going to take for me to shut down both of these adventures, sea-faring for you (indicating Jack) and kum-bah-yahing for you (indicating Sue).

Sue looks at Garrett, puzzled by the word he used.

Garrett: You didn't hear that from me. . . . And Jack, don't repeat it. . . .

THEME SONG and OPENING CREDITS

SCENE 2 - In the hallway at the FBI building.

Tara and Lucy are walking down the hallway, somewhat urgently, with cups of coffee in hand. They are looking for someone. Bobby and Myles are walking down the hallway from the other direction. They are looking for someone.

Tara and Lucy run into Bobby and Myles.

Lucy: (urgently) Have you seen Jack?

Tara: We were just getting coffee and we ran into Randy.

Lucy: And he's on an absolute rampage to find Jack for some reason.

Tara: So we figured we better find Jack first and warn him. Of whatever.

Lucy: Whatever Randy-ism Randy has cooked up for the unsuspecting among us.

Bobby: Hmm. We're on a similar mission.

Myles: We're sitting there minding our own business, trying to down our first cup of joe, and Randy comes flying in like a whirling dervish. Insisting that he has to see Jack now --- Now, I tell you! --- and demanding that we tell him where we're hiding Jack. As if Jack is under the desk somewhere. Or maybe it was Jack's turn to use the invisibility cloak this week.

Bobby: The verbal carnage was enough to make the two of us (indicating Myles) very concerned, I'll say that.

Myles: And "concerned" . . . What kind of understatement is that when it comes to Randy.

Bobby: So, here we are. Also looking for Jack.

They all look around at the people moving through the hallway. Dimitrius comes up, also holding his morning coffee.

Dimitrius: I missed the memo about the conference call in the hallway.

Lucy: We're on Randy patrol.

Tara: We're trying to warn Jack that, for some reason, Randy has him in his sights.

Bobby: In a diabolical way, I might add.

Dimitrius: Diabolical? That's not good. Oh, about fifteen minutes ago, I was coming downstairs and I saw Jack and Sue headed for Garrett's office. They could still be there.

Cut to Dimitrius, Myles, Bobby, Tara and Lucy walking down the hallway. They are not quite to Garrett's door when Jack and Sue, who has Levi, come out. They fall in behind Jack and Sue, close enough to hear what Jack and Sue are saying. But Jack and Sue are so intent on what they are talking about that they don't notice the rest of the team close behind them.

Throughout Jack and Sue's conversation, the rest of the team is glancing at each other, not sure what Jack and Sue are talking about or whether they should be overhearing it.

Jack and Sue are walking quickly, side by side, as the team behind them works to keep up.

Jack: (on a mission) Sue, regardless of what Garrett says, the fact is, it's time for us to get serious.

Sue: (equally determined) I agree.

Tara and Lucy look at each other in some shock as they and the rest of the team are still walking along behind Jack and Sue.

Jack: Not that we haven't been serious all along.

Sue: Yes. But this is the time to just go for it.

Jack: All out. One-hundred, two-hundred percent commitment.

Bobby makes a puzzled face.

Sue: Nothing is going to stop us this time.

Jack: Bring it on.

The rest of the team naturally falls back as they hear what they perceive to be a very personal conversation. They are left standing in the hallway as Jack and Sue walk on. They are a bit embarrassed and unsure what to say to each other.

Myles: (clearing his throat) Um, well. Maybe that man just looked like Jack. And that woman just looked like Sue.

Dimitrius: And that dog just looked like Levi.

The team stands in the hallway, glancing at one another, slowly drinking coffee, as people are passing by in both directions.. It's awkward.

Bobby: I don't know what we were all thinking. Jack will handle Randy, no problem.

Lucy: Right.

SCENE 3 - In the bullpen.

Dimitrius, Bobby, Myles, Tara and Lucy walk in to the bullpen. Sue is seated at her desk and Jack is standing close next to her, looking over her shoulder at their schedule on the computer screen.

Sue: (as the rest of the team walks in, quietly to Jack) Maybe we could do that Wednesday night---

Jack: (leaning closer to look at the screen; quietly back to Sue) Like at dinner? That'd be great.

Jack and Sue notice the team and look up.

Sue: Hi!

Tara: Um, hi.

Lucy: (to Sue) We were kind of looking for you.

Myles: (looking sideways at Lucy) Um, no we weren't. (under his breath, to Lucy) We were looking for Jack. (makes a gesture across his throat, telling Lucy not to say more.)

Cut to the entrance-way to the bullpen, where Randy appears.

Randy: Well, I was looking for Jack and have been since the opening bell this morning..

All except Jack and Sue groan and roll their eyes.

Jack: Okay, Randy. What can I do for you?

Randy: It's about my niece.

Jack: No.

Randy: Jack!

Jack: I'm sorry, Randy. I don't know your niece, and I don't know what you're going to ask me to do for your niece, but the answer is no. Just the way it has to be. I've . . . got more things than usual on my mind. And anyway, no.

Randy: It's only a small favor. And she's a beautiful girl, wait 'til you see her. That counts for something, doesn't it?

Jack: Not always. But . . . Look, I'm sorry, Randy, I'd love to help, but . . . not this week.

Sue: (nicely) Randy, Jack and I are especially . . . involved . . . this week.

Randy: (to Sue) With all due respect, Ms. Thomas, who are you to speak for Agent Hudson?

Jack is miffed at this remark and so is Bobby.

Jack: (to Randy, a little riled) Randy. That's over the line.

Randy sees that Jack is getting mad at him.

Randy: (reluctantly, to Jack) Alright, then. I apologize.

Jack: (fed up) Apologize to Sue.

Randy: (to Sue) I apologize. But, Jack---

Jack: No.

Jack is not angry, but he is firm. He stares at Randy until Randy sighs and storms out, a little in a huff.

Cut to the bullpen.

Jack is standing in front of the big screen. Tara is working the computer. Bobby, Myles, Dimitrius, Lucy and Sue are part of the briefing. A picture of a man is in the center of the screen. Three other photos are arranged around him. One is of a woman, one is of a man, one is of a beach house in a tropical location.

Jack: (pointing to the photo in the middle) As you all know, this is Finbar Trotter.

Myles: Known to his arms-running friends simply as Finbar.

Jack: We call him . . . Trotter. Refresher: Of all the cogs in the East Coast arms trade wheel, at the moment Trotter is the only one we have any chance of catching. But the payoff is, if we catch him ---

Jack pauses, checking what he is going to say.

Myles: If we catch him . . . Dramatic pause . . .

Sue suddenly cracks up and no one knows why.

Sue: I'm . . . sorry. It's not funny, but . . .

Jack: (to Sue, as if he's referencing an inside joke) It's just that . . .

Sue: (recovering herself somewhat, then suddenly having trouble not laughing again) (to Jack) --- this man could ruin our lives.

Jack: Yeah, that's all.

No one knows what in the world Jack and Sue are talking about.

Myles: (looking around) Portal. Where's the portal? The one that we went through to enter this alternate universe.

Sue: Never mind. I'm sorry. (to Jack) I'm sorry for interrupting you.

Jack: (to Sue, laughing a little) Are you ready now?

Sue nods. But then she starts having to repress her laughter again.

Jack: (to Sue) Or are you going to totally crack up on me?

Bobby: I think the pressure must be getting to you both, mate.

Dimitrius: It's not like we haven't done gun-runners before.

Myles: Pressure, maybe. But hardly metamorphic.

Jack: (calmly, but eyeing Sue) Right. Right. Okay. Back to Trotter.

Bobby looks at Jack to let him know he's not off the hook on explaining what this is all about.

Jack: Sue and I have narrowed down three avenues that Trotter is likely to take when he finally does venture out from the rock he's hiding under. He'll go here (pointing to the photo of the woman) --- Linda Renault, the girlfriend.

Tara: Known as "Girlfriend."

Jack: Here (pointing at the photo of the man) --- Tony Larkin, the man who does all Trotter's, shall we say, admin tasks.

Tara: Known as "The Shadow."

Myles: For obvious reasons.

Jack: And, finally --- (Jack points to the third photo, of a beach house in a tropical location.) --- The highly secluded, gated, high-security beach house in Aruba.

Lucy: Nice hide-out.

Tara: Known as "The Beach House in Aruba."

Sue: Maybe Jack and I should check that out.

Bobby pushes his chair back and holds his hands up as if to say, "I'm out."

Cut to the entrance to the bullpen. Garrett is there.

Garrett: (sticking his head into the bullpen) Jack, I need to speak with you.

Cut to the bullpen. Jack is standing in the middle of the bullpen as everyone else sits and stands around.

Jack: I can't believe Randy went over my head to Garrett.

Bobby: How can Garrett make you chauffeur Randy's niece around D.C. and the Virginia suburbs just because she's starting college here?

Jack: He can't. But he can tell me that this girl's father, who is married to Randy's sister ---

Myles: Thus making Randy the uncle.

Jack: --- is a big-time business man who, at some risk to himself, did some important work for us a few years ago. And, having stuck his neck out to help us on a case, it's not such a big deal to provide a little "FBI family" support in this situation.

Bobby: Okay. Fair enough. But why can't Randy take her around? He's her uncle.

Jack: Randy is going to a two-week training program in Cleveland. I think he's leaving today.

Lucy: Far be it from us to let anything get in the way of two weeks without Randy.

Jack sighs.

Tara: So . . . Do you know anything about this niece yet?

Jack: Her name is Carly. And I agreed to two things. To drive her to George Mason University in Fairfax to make her registration appointment, and then to take her to look at some house that belongs to friends of her parents, that she's going to housesit for a year. That's it.

Myles: Good luck with that.

Jack and Sue step toward each other to confer.

Sue: That shouldn't be too bad.

Jack: Well, you could go with me. That would help.

Continue reading at Part 2 . . .