Suffocated

Everyday it seems,

That something new is going on.

Sometimes it's good, sometimes bad,

Some days I'm the king, others the pawn.

There are so many changes,

I get so frustrated.

With nothing for me to do,

I sit here as I am suffocated.

Choking to the very end,

I can't breathe anymore.

Everything so misconstrued,

All this pain I can't ignore.

Pain that comes and goes,

Some that stays so very long.

Left wondering everyday,

Is something that I am doing wrong?

All this sympathy,

That is not what I need.

I feel so lost all the time,

I need some healing when I bleed.

Reckless ideas conjure up in my head,

As they riot through my mind.

A never ending sorrow,

Looking for the things I will never find.