Suicide Prevention: Struggle to Communicate

Suicide is experienced in everyone's lives in some manner. We all have known indirectly or directly, a family member, friend, acquaintance that has succumbed to the painful reality of suicide. This phenomena is especially evident in our teenagers. How do we address this issue? The signs are at times too distant to understand until the actual act occurs. The guilt and pain that survives the victim is overwhelming to some, leaving us all in confusion, wishing there had been another opportunity to prevent the outcome. Perhaps the only manner of prevention we can discover is already readily available.

Communication is an imperative tool in the prevention of suicide in our society. We have to talk with our teens as parents and friends, as often as we have to speak with those adults that allow the abyss of loneliness and despair overcome their natural desire to live. The thought of committing suicide is a reality in all of us at some point in our lives. In most cases, the opportunity to reach out and get help seems trite and pitiful, therefore, a suffering person might choose to internalize their fear until it inevitably blows up in some self-destructive manner, a path to suicide becomes the last option. We have the dark moments that are so frightening that we can't look back, and are afraid that there is no outlet to safely reduce that horror that envelops our every waking moment. The thought of getting out of bed is so fierce that we'd rather roll over and become swept away in our dreams again, rather than face another day. When our dreams become too frightening, the world around us becomes threatening, we haven't shared our anxiety or terror with anyone else because no one could possibly understand, we choose suicide.

Our victim will leave behind family and friends, colleagues and a single person that somehow they've touched that remains grief stricken wondering the age old question, "if only I'd ...". When a person decides upon that fateful outcome, it becomes solely their responsibility. No one else deserves the pain of feeling that they were the cause of a suicidal victim's choice to kill themselves. But that becomes the primary reaction. Glance at the sorrow that gathers as a victim is memorialized; the ashen expression of loss combined with that anger, that immediate despair that lends no answer to the loss. Often the people in attendance will look around and come to the realization that this person whom has selfishly taken their own life, had no clue how many people really and truly cared for them.

Selfish is a word often attached to the victim of suicide. And why should it not be? The actual reasoning for taking one's own life disregards anyone's efforts to help that person overcome the issues that drive them to their death. Generally they will believe that there is no other choice, nobody cares, and certainly noone will miss them when they're gone. Yet, obviously we know the pain of that loss. Look for signs. Talk to that person that you might suspect is contemplating suicide. Talk to them even when they refuse. Don't give up even when it feels like there seems no possibility of getting through to that individual who suffers. Call a helpline, do everything you can to help that individual gradually move away from that loss of hope. Spirituality may seem afar at those most vital times, but energy to overcome the burden of self-destruction will always win out.

We all have dark moments that seem hopeless. It's those times we can't forget the beauty and grace of our world and the chance that God has given each us to thrive. If our victims of suicide could visualize the throngs of well-wishers that memorialize their loss in the weeks afterward, there may truly be a reduction in the numbers of successful tragedies. Our only option is to communicate. Drop our self-pride and righteousness and take the chance the next time you think that person is experiencing such hopeless pain. Their lives are deserving the opportunity to seek happiness through the challenges of our humanity.