Surprising Relationship Advice - Don't Be Too Modest and Polite

Love relationships are very different from other relationships. Relationship advice that works for interactions with colleagues and friends may strangle your love relationship. The following relationship advice can help you avoid sabotaging your love relationship through too much modesty and politeness.

How We Sabotage our Relationships without Realizing it

You had a good upbringing, so you know the basics of good behavior: be polite and modest. If someone compliments you, don't make a big deal out of it. If someone thanks you, you may say "don't mention it." Such relationship advice makes interactions with most people smoother. However, it may be deadly for your most significant relationship.

Your wife just thanked you for taking out the trash so she didn't have to. Perhaps you remembered to get something for her from the store. Instead of a accepting her thanks, you politely say "oh, it was nothing." Your husband complimented you on your outfit, or perhaps he noticed something you added to the family room. Being modest, you minimize it and deflect his compliment.

How Politeness Kills off Love Relationships

When your partner thanks you and you diminish its importance, you're robbing her of the special feeling that her happiness is important to you. If it really was nothing, meant nothing, maybe you don't love her as much as she thought.

When you deflect your husband's compliment, you're implying his opinion is not really important, that you don't need his approval. Doing that diminishes the feeling of partnership in ensuring you're both happy in your relationship.

This doesn't mean you should be arrogant or impolite to your love. Don't tell your husband to "move it already." It's not cool to tell your girlfriend her new dress is ugly. However, being too modest and polite can hurt your relationship.

Top Relationship Advice: Positive Communication Strengthens Your Relationship

Every day compliment your partner about something. Notice his tie sets off his eye color nicely. Tell her you love her perfume. Let him know how having him in your life makes you feel. It almost doesn't matter what it is, just find something to appreciate about your partner.

Every day find something to thank her for. Did she make the bed while you were shaving? Thank her. Did he surprise you with flowers just because? Thank him. However large or small, find something to be thankful about. Of course when your partner thanks you or compliments you, don't forget to accept graciously.

The best relationship advice is simple - every day, share with your partner that you love him. Let her know you trust her. Tell him how special he makes you feel. Tell her you like who you are when she's in your life.

Bottom Line Relationship Advice on Positive Communications

Positive communication is letting your love know what is working in your relationship. Such positive communication is at least as important as communicating what is not working. Continually letting your partner know s/he's making you happy by just being who s/he is, and being in your life is crucial. This positive communication balances the necessary attention to what's missing in your relationship.