Surviving Your First BDSM Play Party

If you have never attended a BDSM play party, but are interested in attending one, it is good to have an idea of what to expect. First of all, it is important to know that each party is different, and much depends on the particular venue where your party is being held. If the party is being held in a private home, the hosts will have their own set of rules for you to abide by for liability sake, and for the safety of everyone attending. The same is true if the party is held in a larger venue, such as a hotel.

Regardless of where the play party is held, here is some general information to help you know what to expect:

What to wear. Many times, a venue will ask that you come to the party in vanilla wear and leave the party in vanilla wear. Once inside, you are free to change into something else. What you change in to is pretty much up to you. At most BDSM parties, pretty much anything goes in regard to clothing (or lack of it). Whereas some people go all out and wear their kinkiest fetish wear, others may be more comfortable in jeans and a t-shirt. Women may want to sport their prettiest, most revealing corset or bustier. Some may want to wear a pretty bra with their jeans. Some people choose to wear nothing at all.

Play stations. Most parties will have different play stations set up. Each area will be monitered by a dungeon moniter. The job of the dungeon moniter is to make sure that everyone abides by any safety rules. The dungeon moniter will also let others know if they are being too loud or disturbing a scene in anyway. A good rule of thumb is to observe a scene quietly. Never interrupt a scene. If you want to comment or ask questions, always do so after the scene is entirely over. If you have a question or concern regarding the scene itself, express your concern to the dungeon moniter. Some scenes can appear scary, but keep in mind that the participants are consenting adults who may stop it at any time.

Colors of availability. Most play parties will have different colors you can choose from to wear, usually in the form of a wristband. One color will mean you will only play with your partner. Another color will mean you are open to playing with others. Another color may mean that you are there only to observe and not play. The colors of availability will let others at the party know if you are open to playing with them or not. Even if you choose a color saying you are open to playing with others, you are not obligated to do so if approached. It is entirely up to you.

Protocols. In the BDSM community, there can be different protocols to be on the look out for. For example, if a Master and slave are at the party, it would be inappropriate for someone to approach the slave without first getting permission from the Master. If you are a slave attending a play party, it is your job to obey your Master at the party. This shows everyone that you respect your Master. The worst thing that you can do is embarrass or disgrace your Master in public. You should stay with your Master unless instructed to do otherwise, and you should not be conversing with other dominants without permission from your Master.

Attending your first play party can be a bit intimidating, simply because it is a new experience. You will find, however, that the people are kind, helpful, and have no expectations of you. The biggest rule to remember is to be yourself and be comfortable. If you are not comfortable wearing 6 inch heels and taking your clothes off, there is absolutely no pressure to do that. You will be fine in your regular street clothes. There is also no pressure at all to participate in any of the dungeon scenes.

Remember that it is important to always abide by the rules of any BDSM activity, and make sure anything you participate in is safe, sane, and consensual.