Surviving the Holidays as a Sports Widow

For sports fans - particularly football fans - November through January is "prime time." Besides professional and collegiate basketball and hockey seasons being in full swing, there's a multitude of college football rivalry and bowl games, the end of the NFL season and the playoffs, and the biggest of the big games, the Super Bowl.

Millions of people around the country embrace this barrage of athletic excitement, as it offers a welcomed distraction from the holiday, family and end-of-year hoopla that surround this time of year. But, while the masses are enjoying all the action, there are others who are left behind in the shadows, as they wait for their significant others to emerge from the hypnotic, sports-induced trance.

"Sports widows," as they're affectionately called, are the spouses of sports fanatics. Most of these "widows" have absolutely no interest in sports, making this a frustrating and annoying time of the year. After all, it's pretty difficult to finish your holiday shopping when your partner can't be pulled away from the electronics department because it's fourth down and the Colts are just ten yards out of field goal range, and it's even harder to hold holiday parties when all the sports nuts are huddled around the television in the den, while the rest of the family is mingling in the living room.

But, in defense of the sports fans, these games need to be watched. There's just something about sports that draws people to it. It's a phenomenon that is, in essence, an epic tale that never ends. Sports are like a religion for many people; it's what they live, breathe, sleep and eat. As corny and nonsensical as that may sound to the non-fan, it's completely understood by real fans. That's why this time of year is so important, especially for the football fans. College and professional football seasons wrap up when the year does, so the games have increased importance.

Besides that, many sports fans now compete in fantasy leagues (games where fantasy owners build teams of professional players and compete against other fantasy owners in games decided by the real-life statistics of individual players or teams of professional sports), so every sporting event becomes important. Casual fans, which may have only watched the sporting events of their local teams in the past, now have a vested interest in every game, because they have "their" players competing. Plus, fantasy football playoffs usually coincide with the end of the NFL regular season, so the last game of the year between two last-place teams all of a sudden becomes important.

Nevertheless, the holiday season is supposed to be about family, friends, companionship and sociability - and these are the main gripes of the "sports widows." People come in to visit from out of town, and a large amount of time, effort and preparation is put into cooking, cleaning and decorating, so happiness and togetherness are expected.

But, all of this is thrown out the window when games are on television every night of the week. What usually could be ignored on one given day of the week now dominates all day, every day. The "sports widows" lament the way these games monopolize their mates' time and attention, but there are ways the fan and the "widow" can coexist.

For one, "widows" can plan days or nights out with other friends and family members who aren't sports fans. So, when the fans are busy watching the Holiday-Peach-Gator-Whatever Bowl, their partners can get together to dine, see movies, shop or whatever else floats their boats. This will save hassles and arguments, and both sides will be enjoying themselves.

Another diversion for the "widows" could be the tackling of annoying chores that have been piling up. While their partners are glued to the television set, some "widows" pull out the old "honey-do" list and get cracking. Taking care of all the tasks they've been nagged about can be a great way to pass the time while Louisiana Tech battles New Mexico State.

If you're a "widow" yourself, I know what you're thinking: "Forget the diversions, I want my whole family together!" That is a valid point, and it brings us to perhaps the best way for fans and widows to get along - by understanding each others' needs and wants.

The fan can teach his or her partner the nuances of the games, and the ways and reasons certain plays are run. The more the "widows" know about the games, the less likely they'll be annoyed by excessive viewings of them.

On the flip side, the fan can compromise more with the "widow." Maybe the fans can tape the game and watch it when their partners are in bed or not at home. Or maybe - Gasp! - one or two games really can be missed. Or, the fan can offer dinner dates or trips to places the "widow" enjoys in exchange for the hours spent on the couch. Bottom line, in any relationship, there has to be some give and take.

Sports and love - strange bedfellows, but with a little effort, it can work.