Surviving the Storm of Childhood Abuse

According to Cook and Cook, child maltreatment is a universal term used to describe any and all situations in which a child is harmed and/or neglected (Cook, 2005). This term can appear quite complicated until it is broken down into its four sub categories. These categories include physical abuse, neglect, sexual abuse, and psychological abuse (Cook, 2005).

Physical Abuse is the type of abuse that most people I know imagine when they hear that a child has been abused. It covers corporeal measures such as hitting, kicking, slapping, burning, or other wise physically torturing a child. Sometimes, physical abuse will leave evidence like mysterious bruises, welts, or cuts (Saisan, 2008). However, not all cases will be this easy to diagnose. After all, it is not uncommon for a child to experience a multitude of age-inappropriate injuries (Saisan, 2008). Therefore, it is important to look for injuries that appear to have a pattern such as marks made by a belt, switch, paddles, ect... Of course, you should never overlook children who display a pattern of severe injuries (Saisan, 2008).

The second category of maltreatment will also tend to spark public attention. It consists of failing to provide for a child's most basic needs, and is called neglect. For instance, a child must have clean clothing, nutritious food, and a roof over their heads. They must receive academic training; along with proper medical, dental, and psychological care (Cook, 2005). If these needs are not met then the child is being neglected. Neglected children often appear inappropriately dressed. Their clothing may be dirty and/or ill fitted (Saisan, 2008). They may continuously exhibit poor hygiene habits such as matted or unwashed hair, and/or noticeable body odors (Saisan, 2008). These children often appear unsupervised, tardy to school, and disruptive in public (Saisan, 2008).

The third category of maltreatment concerns a controversial topic that most people I know have a hard time discussing. The category is sexual abuse. Sexual abuse is a term used to describe any sexual act between an adult and child (Cook, 2005). It consists of both physical and non-physical components. The physical component may include inappropriate touch, or actual sexual penetration (oral, vaginal, or anal) (Cook, 2005). The non-physical component may include exposing and/or including the child in indecent acts (X-rated movies, masturbation and/or involving the child in pornographic material.) (Cook, 2005) Children who are sexually abused can display a variety of behaviors. Red flags include children who display intense interest or inappropriate knowledge about sexual affairs, children who act out in sexual manners, or children who are overly sensitive about sexual topics (Saisan, 2008). In other words, it is just as common for a child to become aggressive as it is for them to become withdrawn. It also is not uncommon for abused children to engage in self-destructive behaviors such as drug or alcohol abuse, self-mutilation, and/or suicide attempts (Saisan, 2008).

[Please note that the word child, when referring to sexual abuse implies that the sexual act occurred between an adult and a child who was under the legal age of consent or who was of the age of consent but did not participate willingly. The age of consent varies depending on which state the child resides. For instance, the legal age of consent is 16 in the state of Ohio. Therefore, a child age 16 and older can legally engage in consensual sex with a person over the age of 18, and it is completely legal. (Personal experience: I married at 14, my daughter was 15 with a 23 yr old, and my 16 yr old son has a 24 yr old girl friend)]

The last category of abuse is of a psychological nature. It includes any and all behaviors that can intimidate or isolate a child (Cook, 2005). For instance, you cannot put-down, threaten, or say things that will damage a child's self-esteem (Cook, 2005). You cannot use verbal or non-verbal means to eliminate, segregate, or prevent a child from engaging in social interactions (Cook, 2005). This includes engaging in acts of parental alienation, which is defined as interfering or severing a healthy bond between a parent and child (Personal Experience: I helped win a child custody case in 2000, in North Carolina, because the mother engaged in acts of parental alienation, which was considered child neglect/emotional abuse). Because psychological abuse seldom leaves concrete marks, the signs are harder to detect, but they do exist (Saisan, 2008). For example, psychologically abused children often appear to be excessively introverted, apprehensive, or frightened of making a mistaken (Saisan, 2008). These children commonly take on a caregivers roll toward siblings, or react towards them aggressively (Saisan, 2008). Then again, it is not uncommon for an older child to regress and revert back to an earlier mental or behavioral level (Saisan, 2008).

Of course, this section would not be complete without stating that the above warning signs should be taken with a grain of salt. After all, we are living in an era where sexual information and images are around every corner. The information blasts from the radio, tv, and computer. Not only that, but individual children react to abusive experiences in different ways, which means they may not react at all (Saisan, 2008). (Please See Resilience)

History

Since the beginning of time, there have been children who have been raped, beaten, and tortured. Matter a fact; it was not until the 19^th century that the American government began to issue children the same protection that was possessed by animals (Mersch, n.d.). Unfortunately, the seriousness of abuse was over looked until 1962, when the term "battered child syndrome" entered the medical language (Mersch, n.d.). "Battered child syndrome is defined as the collection of injuries sustained by a child as a result of repeated mistreatment or beating (U.S. Department of Justice, n.d.). Of course, even with such knowledge it took an additional fourteen years for the United States to adopt a law that would mandate the reporting of suspected abuse (Mersch, n.d.).

In today's society, mandatory reporting falls in the hands of professionals, who come in contact with a child through their ordinary workday. They are expected to report any and all types of observed or suspected abuse. Most of the time, this system works well. However, I have also known individuals who have taken their position a little too far, made false reports, and upset the life's of the children they were trying to protect. This seems to happen because the individual lacks the guidelines needed to make a proper decision. Therefore when left to his or her own instincts, they are more apt to view the situation through ethnocentric lenses. In other words, we as a society have come a long way towards protecting societies children, but we still have a long way to go.

Eliminating The Myths

If I were asked what the largest problem associated with the elimination of child abuse was, I would have to say the myths. It is hard to battle hundreds of years worth of allegory when so many people believe the lies. For example, there are people who still believe that instances of child abuse are rare (ASCA, 2008). There are people who believe that acts are only abusive if they are violent (ASCA, 2008). There are people who believe that children will always grow up and beyond abuse (ASCA, 2008). There are people who believe that abused children grow to become abusive adults (Cook, 2008). There are people who believe that abusive situations are none of their business (Cook, 2008). Unfortunately, those people are wrong!

The fact is many of societies customs concerning childrearing (such as harsh spanking, threatening or shouting at children) are detrimental to children's physical and psychological well-being. These acts do not necessarily involve violence or anger, because the abusive behavior often involves an adult who is attempting to control his or her child(ren), and/or are using the child(ren) as inanimate objects instead of respecting their rights as individuals (ASCA, 2008). Maybe this is why so many adults are deeply affected by the abuse and neglect that occurred in their childhood. This does not mean that abused children grow up to become abused, because 70% of abused children grow up and develop positive parenting skills.

Resilience (ASCA, 2008)

For the past thirty-two and a half years, I have wondered why the years of abuse had such limited affect on me. I mean, despite years of physical sexual, emotional abuse, and neglect I never lost my appetite, acted out, became withdrawn, or gave my friends, family, or associates any cause of alarm. Actually, when the abuse I endured became public, I was labeled a resilient child. They said I required limited visits to a counselor, because I already knew it was not my fault, and had never veered from the life path of a normal child. To an extent, they were correct. I say this because for the most part, I was normal, but then, I had mastered the art of disassociation. Disassociation means, drifting off into ones own imagination, and imagining that he or she is in a safe place that is far away from the current situation (Boeree, 2006). Some believe that this is a negative practice, but I know it was my saving grace.

Of course, there was more to it than that. I had always hated the term victim. In my family, the word meant weak, or incapable of self-defense. Therefore, I kept moving forward despite the fact that I had been molested by my great-grandfather, my step father, and father, physically assaulted by my mother, and emotionally abused by five different guardians over the course of fourteen years. Matter a fact I developed a philosophy that I continue to use today; If you continue to "play" the role of a victim, then you give your abuser the power they want to maintain. Therefore, it is better to live and live well, because if you move on you beat the abuser at his or her own game. Maybe I was more intelligent than I ever gave myself credit for back then, because today I know this line of thinking is called Reactance Formation. Reaction formation according to Sigmund Freud is when someone in authority makes a prediction and the person fights to separate that prediction from him or her self. Therefore, they react in the exact opposite manner than expected.

Unfortunately, not all children are capable of meeting such a challenge. You see, the impact of abuse not only depends on the type of abuse a person endures, but is also determined by a number of variables (Cook, 2008). For instance, the gender of the victim and perpetrator, the type and severity of the abuse, the duration of, and time since the abuse, individual disposition, and bio-psychological factors all make a huge difference (ASCA, 2008). Then you have other factors such as the individual's cognitive ability, his or her cultural background, family support, and community connection (ASCA, 2008). After all, research shows that individuals who possess higher levels of self-esteem, an internal locus of control, and an external attribution of blame will have better coping strategies than those without, and will therefore have a better chance of reaching a positive outcome (ASCA, 2008).

Childhood and Beyond

Unfortunately, the lower the child's level of resilience, the better the chance that the abused child will face a lifetime of hardships. For instance, infants who experienced emotional, physical, or environmental neglect tend to show signs of depression and withdrawal (CWIG, 2008). Adolescence on the other hand are at least 25% more apt to engage in risky behavior that leads to delinquency, low academic achievements, drug use, teen pregnancy, and sexually transmitted disease (CWIG, 2008). This does not even begin to cover the effects that can be suffered in adulthood.

80% of young adults who survive abuse suffer from at least one psychological disorder by the time they reach age twenty-one (CWIG, 2008). Their troubles include long-term battles with depression, substance abuse, anxiety attacks, eating disorders, suicidal thoughts, uncontrollable rage, and other severe diagnosis (CWIG, 2008). In other words, the methods they use to cope with their past, eventually reaches out and bites them as they attempt to adapt to society. When this happens the adult survivor's life becomes dysfunctional (Mersch, n.d.) and may lead the individual to join a new set of statistics; the one that says that victims of abuse have a 59% chance of being arrested as a child and a 28% chance of being arrested as an adult (Mersch, n.d.).

Ok, so even if survivors are able to slip passed the 80% chance of having a psychological "defect, they still only have a seventy-two percent chance of bi-passing a visit to the local correctional center, this still doesn't mean that if they make it that far that they are out of the woods. You see, they face plenty of other issues. For instance, survivors tend to be extremely sensitive and empathetic (Personal Experience: I've been apart of many online survivor support groups, and have many many friends who are survivors of childhood abuse). They can easily internalize any negative message they receive about themselves, their environment, or others. This sensitivity ultimately affects the way that the individual interacts with others, along with their ability to create or maintain close relationships. After all, many of us survivors have a tendency to become defensive, aggressive, fearful, or shy when faced with negative stimuli.

Conclusion

The fact is abuse and neglect happens within an immediate family, but the impact of abuse extends much further. Society as a group carries the burden of both direct and indirect costs (CWIG, 2008). The direct costs include, maintaining a child protection system, whose job it is to not only investigate, but provide services for families who have been touched by abuse, and/or are at high risk for such occurrences; as well as funding the expense occurred by the judicial, law enforcement, health, and mental health systems (CWIG, 2008).

The indirect costs of child abuse and neglect includes the expense related to juvenile and adult criminal activity, mental illness, substance abuse, and domestic violence. It can also include unemployment and underemployment, the fee of special education services, and increased health care costs. Combined we Americans pay more than $93 Billion per year (CWIG, 2008), which makes me wonder if we are doing something wrong.

You see, I believe that most people really would like to become better parents. I believe we can see this by the number of self help books sold, the parenting classes that are attended, and the online support groups that are forming on a daily bases. Therefore, if it were up to me, I would support primary preventative programs. It is these programs that will assist parents or prospective parents to learn the necessary actions they need in order to reduce the need for secondary and tertiary prevention. After all, secondary and tertiary programs tend to place the children in foster homes, where they will end up scoring lower than the general public on measures of cognitive ability, verbal communication, and academic achievements (CWIG, 2008). Of course, reducing the need for such intervention, we can save tax money, which is what America seems to be all about.

Resources:

Adults Surviving Child Abuse (ASCA). (2008). Resource Page. Retrieved from the Adults

Surviving Child Abuse website: http://www.asca.org.au/displaycommon.cfm?an=6

Boeree, C. George (2006). Sigmund Freud 1856-1939 retrieved Jan 20, 2007

From the Personality Theories Website:

http://webspace.ship.edu/cgboer/freud.html

Child Welfare Information Gateway (CWIG). (2008). Long-Term Consequences of Child Abuse

and NeglectFact Sheet. Retrieved on June 1, 2009 from the Child Welfare Information

Gateway website: http://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/factsheets/long_term_consequences.cfm#physical

Cook, J. L., & Cook, G. (2005). Child development: Principles and perspectives. Boston: Allyn

and Bacon.

Mersch, J., MD, FAAP (n.d.) Child Abuse. Retrieved on June 3, 2009 from Medicine Net

Website: http://www.medicinenet.com/child_abuse/page9.htm

Saisan, J., MSW., Jaffe-Gill, J., M.A., &., Segal, J., PhD. (2008) Abuse and Neglect Warning

Signs of Abuse and How to Report It. Retrieved on June 1, 2009 from the Help Guide Website: http://www.helpguide.org/mental/child_abuse_physical_emotional_sexual_neglect.htm

U.S. Department Of Justice (n.d.) Battered Child Syndrome: Investigating Physical Abuse and

Homicide. Retrieved on June 4, 2009 from the National Criminal Justice Referral Service

Website: http://www.ncjrs.gov/pdffiles1/ojjdp/161406.pdf